Brothers in arms
by blauhoernchen55
Summary: Who knew the research Carson was doing would have such an impact? Evan blinked unbelieving at the screen. None of this could be real. But then again it was the best present ever. What was he going to do about it? Part of him, it was the greater part, was glad as mad while the other part was just shell-shocked.
1. Surprise

**AN:** I couldn't put the relevant info in the summary. Otherwise there wouldn't be a surprise.. ;-) Let's just say it's a kind of alternate universe (what if...)

Thanks to June Odyssey who volunteered for being my beta and fixed my errors. So you're now able to concentrate on the story...

* * *

He blinked unbelieving at the screen. None of this could be real. But then again it was the best present ever. What was he going to do about it? Part of him, it was the greater part, was glad as mad while the other part was just shell-shocked.

**20 Minutes earlier**

Major Evan Lorne sighed contentedly as he finished the last report. Finally! This week's paperwork was done. His CO had been in the infirmary for the last couple of days, so it had also been up to him to work on requests of the troop. Colonel Sheppard was a trouble magnet…

**Flashback - 3 days earlier**

"Unscheduled off-word activation!"

"Receiving ID-Code. It's Dr. McKay's ID."

"Drop the shield!" Instructed Weir.

Lorne, who was passing by, took a step nearer. Something must have happened to the team but hopefully nobody had been injured. Dr. McKay was the first to step through the gate, right behind him was Ronon who supported Colonel Sheppard, and Teyla was being the rearguard.

"Medical team into the control room!"

'Of course it had to be the Colonel!' The thought immediately crossed his mind. Sheppard being very protective would always try everything to keep his teams out of harm's way. Unfortunately because of it mostly it was him being injured.

"We were ambushed on our way." Teyla explained as she anxiously she rushed over to Sheppard. "Colonel how are you?"

"Tut! HE will rebound right away! I however have received a cut! Do you know how fast something like that can get infected? Surely there are now just about hundred of bacteria getting developed. I have to see Carson right way!"

"McKay!" Exclaimed Sheppard in a tight voice.

"Rodney! The Colonel received a severe blow to his head." Teyla was on edge.

"I'm fine. I just need to rest a little bit."

In the meanwhile Lorne had reached his CO and was able to see very clearly how pale he looked. Presumably he had a concussion.

"No really I'm fine." Sheppard announced stubbornly, only to hit the floor the very next moment.

"Colonel!" – Teyla and Weir

"Sheppard" - Ronon

"Sir!" - Lorne

"Ooh…" - McKay

"Where is my patient?!" - Carson

-0-0-0-0-

When Lorne later called him at the sick bay Carson informed him that Sheppard indeed had a severe concussion. He had thrown up multiple times already and fallen asleep a minute ago.

For a moment Lorne took a seat next to him. "Sir," he muttered "What am I going to do with you? You have to take better care of yourself."

He liked Sheppard. He was pleasant-natured and always cared for everybody's well being on Atlantis. His leadership was laid-back, which was a relief out here. He didn't even want to begin to think about how things would be if he had a CO with more love for military exercise. Such as Caldwell. Not a bad officer but not comfortable if you had to cooperate seven days a week around the clock. Sheppard permitted his men the liberty they needed. In exchange everyone would give one hundred percent as soon as it mattered. Nobody knew what could happen when they went through the gate and everyone relied to Sheppard. The men and women under his command confided in his motto; "We don't leave people behind!"

**End Flashback – still 20 min earlier**

Lorne set out for sick bay. The Colonel was to be released today…

"Oh hello Major," Carson greeted him. "Just in time. Colonel Sheppard here is being released just now."

"Sir!" Lorne saluted Sheppard and to Carson: "Hello doc! So everything is alright again?"

"Yes. The colonel pulled through just fine."

"Well…" Began Sheppard, while he sat on the edge off the bed dangling his legs.

"Oh good," McKay cut in from the entrance while he came around the corner with Teyla and Ronon. "Sheppard, I need you in my lab. I want to finally try some of the devices, which we brought with us from P3X-754. You have been lounging around about three days already."

"Thanks for asking Rodney, I'm fine."

"Oh come on Sheppard. Don't pretend you didn't complain yesterday about getting out of here."

Ronon grinned along with Teyla and Lorne. Actually the Colonel had tried to leave the sick bay when he had barely recovered. Carson had not been amused.

"Colonel it's nice to see you up again." Teyla tended to Sheppard.

"So let's get out of here. Lorne, is there something I should know?"

"No, Sir. There haven't been any surprises these last days. Sgt Miller and Private Harriman have requested a leave and will be taking a trip to earth with the next arrival of the Daedalus."

"O.K. Thanks Major. Those two deserve some vacation. So McKay, since you obviously haven't been killed by bacteria..."

Lorne had to take all his willpower to not laugh out loud.

"…let's see if our visit to that planet paid off." Sheppard left the sick bay with his team – a bounce in his step and Lorne's laughing eyes following them.

"Take good care of yourself Colonel!" Carson shouted after them.

"Sure thing," came the laconic reply, already halfway down the corridor.

"Well then. I will tend to my studies about the ATA-gene."

Lorne, always eager to learn something that seemed useful to him, and the ATA-gene was very important in Atlantis and the Pegasus-galaxy, asked Carson to explain to him what he had accomplished so far.

Delighted Carson began his explanation.

**2 minutes earlier**

"Have a look Major. We are currently comparing the ATA-gene of the expedition members, who are natural gene-carriers. To do this we only have to compare a part of the DNA. Since Colonel Sheppard has so far the strongest gene we take his ATA-gene as a reference. Now I'm comparing his gene and your gene…." Carson typed away on his laptop. "Well, see now… that's very strange…"

"What is it doc? Discovered something interesting?"

"Yeah well lad. You could say so. I rather want to… just a moment… there it is. Let's have a look… Major, is there anything about your family you want to confess?"

"What? No, why? What's up Carson?"

**Present**

Evan couldn't believe it. He had a brother. A half-brother. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard. John Sheppard. John.

"Your secret is safe with me lad. I won't do anything. I'll leave everything up to you." One could easily tell that he wasn't less shaken than Lorne.

Of course, Evan hadn't thought ahead. Who knew if he could stay on Atlantis if this ever got out. Nobody could tell how their superiors would react on that one. "Fraternization" would really put it about right.

Evan sank back on one of the hospital beds. His mother. Of course.

"My mother lost all her memories due to an accident before she met may father. Her memories never came back."

"Well that unusual. Complete retrograde amnesia. That couldn't have been easy for your mother. Although – it could be an explanation. The Colonel is slightly older than you are...

"…well perhaps you should get to know your brother before hand and try to get to know more about his parents rather than doing wild guessing." Carson looked at him sympathetically.

Completely dazed Evan wavered out of the sick bay. His mind running over time.

* * *

**AN**

The next chapter: I started it all over, because I wasn't any longer content with what I wrote this summer. But I'm working on it.

Thanks to everyone who is reviewing. :-)) That's really speeding up my writing but sadly I still don't have much free time. :-(


	2. Talking

**AN** Thanks to my beta June odyssey and to everybody else who encouraged me with their rewies :-))

I hope you'll have as much fun reading this chapter as I had writing it. Enjoy.

* * *

Evan didn't have a restful sleep. He tossed and turned the whole night and wasn't at all ready to get up when the alarm went off. What was he to do? He dressed himself without paying attention. 'You're sure you got that one right?' Evan's considerations were interrupted by his inner accurate military sense. Just as he was about to come up with some sort of plan, which of course immediately slipped back deep into subconsciousness. 'So what?' Evan told himself, bugged out. 'It isn't as if you could mismatch your socks or the color of your shirt wouldn't fit with your fatigues.' Still a bit on edge with himself and deep in his thoughts the Major was finally strolling down the corridor on his way to the mess hall when he run into Private Miller.

"Major." The Private saluted.

"Private."

Just then Miller's brows furrowed and he looked at him oddly but quickly tried to cover it. Evan didn't know what to make out of it so he shrugged it off. Right now he had other things to worry about than the odd behavior of a Private. Not much longer and he would have reached the mess hall. _So_ he had to come up with_some _kind of plan how to approach John – _quickly_. Evan was again buried in his head when he was startled by a, "Good morning, Major!" from Teyla.

"Oh. Uh, good morning, Teyla!" Evan greeted her back when sure enough Teyla's usually friendly look morphed into the same odd expression as the Private's. What's all this about? Evan wondered. Surely nobody could know anything about his new-found brother?!

"Hum, Major?" Teyla began with a small smile on her face. "I wonder if there is again some tradition from earth I don't know about?"

"What?" Evan asked dumbfounded.

"Well, I just wanted to know. There seems so much tradition on earth I yet have to learn about."

Evan didn't have a clue what she was talking about. And there were still these twitches around the corner of her mouth.

"I just think it's strange that you, as an officer, don't uphold the dress-code since you're wearing your shirt inside out!"

Oh for …! Sh..! Evan was barely able to utter some kind of thanks to Teyla before he turned sharp and hurried back to his quarters. 'Well I ask whether you are sure…' Evan wondered briefly if you could really be spiteful with yourself.

Behind him he could hear Teyla's good-humored snigger.

Great! Just great!

He had nearly reached his quarters when he ran into McKay of all people.

"Major! Do you know where to find the Colonel? See, those devices we started to check out yesterday…"

Suddenly McKay's gaze seemed to transfix itself to Evan's shirt.

"You're wearing your shirt inside out, Major!" he blurted out mercilessly.

"Well thanks McKay, but I already knew that." Evan answered evenly.

"You knew it? Then why haven't you changed it?" McKay wondered. "Never mind." McKay snipped his fingers. "You know what? I think I will most likely find the Colonel in the mess hall." Much to Evan's relief McKay continued his way down the corridor without questioning him any further.

Quickly Evan entered his quarters and let out a sigh. If things were going to continue like this all day… He then turned his shirt 'outside-in' and left his quarters determined not to let this get to him.

When he actually reached the mess hall this time McKay had found John and was happily chattering. Teyla and Ronon were also sitting with them. Evan got himself some coffee and Cereals and strolled over. He had decided to join them. Clearly he had to get to know his brother. Up until now John and him hadn't even been friends, though they got along quite well. Evan had no clue how to approach things but he knew he wanted to get to know John for real. Just take the first step he told himself, trying to calm his nerves.

"Morning Colonel, Ronon." He greeted and nodded also to McKay and Teyla. "May I join you?"

"Morning Major. Sure, grab a seat." John answered while Ronon just nodded.

"Ah, there you are again Lorne," McKay said, than taking a closer look at his shirt he continued "Now you changed? Why not before?"

"Rodney!" Teyla tried to stop him, knowing where he was heading.

"What?" McKay asked "It happened to me lot while I was working on my first doctorate. My mind was just focused on things of greater importance I used to wear my shirt inside-out nearly all the time."

Sheppard and Ronon had stopped eating, John's eyebrows meeting up with his hairline. His mouth agape he stared at McKay and then glanced to Evan who _knew_ he'd be fully flushed. Trust McKay to bring it up. And trust McKay to find this natural. Now Evan, all_he _wanted was find himself a nice hiding place. He gulped.

Teyla glared at McKay and tried to ease the awkwardness.

"So Major Lorne. I hope your days haven't been too stressful with Colonel Sheppard being at the sick bay."

Evan looked at her gratefully. But he was also crestfallen. If he approached more private things like family now it would just look strange. So this opportunity was ruined.

Ronon and John started chewing again.

SGASGASGA

Evan had to go on a mission later that day, a routine check-up on some of their alleys. His team, Sgt. Stackhouse and Private Cain, was already waiting for him at the locker room.

"So Major," Sgt. Stackhouse said. "You think things will be fine? I do hope so."

"You remember this awesome meal we got last time. Man, they sure know how to cook." He remembered both and Cain nodded in agreement when Sheppard and Ronon strolled by.

"Sir! Ronon."

"Guys." Ronon said.

"Well, enjoy your meal." Sheppard said instead of a greeting.

"Thank you sir, we surely will." Evan replied. "So, some last instructions?"

"No Major, I just wanted to make sure everything's in order."

Evan looked at him oddly, because it wasn't like John to check on him and so he wondered was this was about. He was still looking at John while he grabbed for his tac vest. Out of the corner of his eyes he saw something white sticking on the front of it and turned to look at it.

Of course! He should have known John would pull a prank. His vest was labeled "outside" on the outside and … he turned it… "inside" on the inside.

John and Ronon snickered while Stackhouse and Cain looked at each other confused.

"One thing's for sure. If you're ever wearing your shirt inside-out, be sure you don't run into McKay to spill it out." Evan commented dryly and then had to laugh at himself finally with everyone joining him. Maybe this was becoming a good day after all.

He few minutes later he walked through the gate with his team, much more lighthearted than in the early morning. Little did he know what this day yet to bring.


	3. Missing

**A/N: So finally I've been able to come up with the third chapter. Thanks again to my beta June Odyssey for her quick work and encouragement. **

**Thanks for everyone who reviewed and encouraged me also. :-))**

**The story isn't following the correct time line of the series.**

* * *

Evan had enjoyed his stay on P3X-536 and went straight to Dr. Weir for debriefing after coming home through the gate with his team talking about the delicious meal they had been served all the way.

"Col. Sheppard's team is overdue." Dr. Weir informed him, obviously worried, after he reported back.

"Did you have any radio contact?"

"No."

"Well Ma'am you know how these four are…." He tried, not only to calm _her_ down.

"No. Well how are they?"

"Well sometimes they are so busy doing these things they do that they forgetting how much you worry…."

Dr. Weir raised an eyebrow.

"…we worry." Evan admitted and he _did_ worry.

He caught his men in the locker room. "Okay guys, we need to get going once more. The Colonel's team is overdue." Hopefully nothing really happened. But whenever Sheppard – no John, Even corrected himself – his brother John was in that case you never knew.

While walking to the gate-room Evan mused how strange things were because now that he knew about John being his brother he looked at him with different eyes. Sure, he had liked John from the start, but they rarely spend any of their spare time together. Now he'd like to change that fact and spend more time, much more time with him. They had _some_ catching up to do.

Evan's mind wandered back in time.

_The SGC was humming with activity. Newly known was the fact that Atlantis had been able to send a message. Apparently the expedition had made many fantastic discoveries but had also come across of an overpowering enemy. The enemy's superiority had been so overpowering that every member of the expedition recorded a last regard to their family. Everyone but Major Sheppard as Evan noticed. Fortunately this message was received by Earth at a time when they had been able to help. As Evan got to know Col. Everett had been installed as new commanding officer and immediately took off to Atlantis with his men. Everett, who wasn't known for his tact, didn't make a bone about his opinion of Sheppard's coup de grace for Col. Sumner who had been a close friend of Everett._

_Back then Evan could only suspect how the arrival of Col. Everett would proceed for Weir and Sheppard. Soon after the Colonel had come back aboard the Daedalus, looking like an old man after a wraith had fed on him, and with a completely different opinion of Major Sheppard. The crew of the Daedalus had been telling the story. Right at their arrival Major Sheppard had been flying a suicide mission to rescue Atlantis and its residents. Due to his willingness to make sacrifice he had been able to destroy the attacking basis-ship only being rescued in the last minute by the arriving Daedalus. _

Evan cringed at the memory, he'd never had known his brother or that he had a brother at all.

"_Hi Evan!"_

"_Hi Peter!" Evan was greeting back his friend whom he was meeting at the mess hall for lunch._

"_Did you already hear it?"_

"_Hear what?" Evan raised an eyebrow questionably to his friend._

"_Well, it seems Caldwell will be the new CO on Atlantis."_

"Caldwell_!"_

"_Yeah, by the look of it he's Landry's favorite and the committee doesn't complain this time."_

"_Well I imagine life's going to change pretty much on Atlantis as I highly doubt Caldwell will like to have any 'pool-parties' at the pier."_

"_Not likely. But then again, Caldwell won't have to fear Weir throwing herself at him, when he seems to be returning from the death."_

"_She did what?!" Evan choked at his coffee._

"_Heard it earlier from Private Simmons, she was present and said Major Sheppard looked more terrified than he did back in the worst of the fray." At which both Evan and Peter had to laugh out loud._

Now Evan found himself back with his team on yet another rescue mission for his brother, wondering what John would do if he ever tried to hug him on one of his marvelous returns from the death.

Determinedly Evan led his men trough the Gate. It appeared the sun would be sinking soon. The gate had been built on a small platform, an overgrown and fading path leading away, presumably to a village nearby. Evan tried to contact the missing team. "This is Lorne. Col. Sheppard please come in." But his only response was fluctuating noise.

On Evan's command Sgt. Stackhouse and Pvt. Cain started to deploy.

"Keep your eyes open and report when there's something strange."

"Understood, sir!"

"You can count on us, sir!"

Evan knew that, of course, but it did make a great difference whether you were looking for your CO, or your brother, and so he set forth concentrating hard and trying to scan his surrounding accurately while making fast progress. No trace of his brother or his team.

An hour later there was still no sign of them. Sh… Evan was getting more restless every minute. He tried to focus on the bright side: the village was now in sight and it was most likely they would find them there. He paused and sighed, his mind wandering back once more.

_He and Peter were still laughing when his intercom went off: _

"_Major Lorne, please report to General Landry." He was startled._

"_Do you know what Landry wants?"_

"_Not a clue. I tell you later. You're up to catching a beer together this evening? I'm not on duty."_

"_Gladly. At 2000?"_

"_O.K. Until later then."_

"_Do come in, Major!"_

"_Sir! Major Lorne reporting as ordered."_

"_At ease Major. You have been on the select list for your own SG-team for quite a while now."_

_Wow. His own team. He would have _something _to celebrate this evening with Peter._

"_It occurs that you'd have to tie it with even more responsibility…"_

"_Sir?" Evan was confused. More responsibility than his own team?_

"_Well Major, I've had a meeting with Dr. Weir and the committee and it seems as if Atlantis will be in need of a new second in command…"_

_The further words of the General were lost on Evan._

'_Atlantis. Second in command. It seemed as if not only would Caldwell be given command no Sheppard would be displaced. Why? That would be a punch in the gut for Sheppard and a slap in the face.' Evan winced in sympathy. 'I'll be Caldwell's second. Oookaay? I'll miss my friends. I'll have to do everything by the book. No uncouth remarks.' Surely Evan's mind was a mess. 'They're sending me to Atlantis. Mom and Dad will be sad. I'll be hardly able to see them very often. Julie and Tom and the kids, what will I tell my sister and the boys? Are there any Mail contacts from Atlantis to earth now? From Atlantis! Wow. By the way - I wonder whether I'll be able to bring my easel?'_

"_I hope you will perform your duty as excellent on Atlantis under Lt. Colonel Sheppard as you did here in the SGC Major Lorne."_

'_Under Sheppard, wait a moment under Lt. Col. Sheppard? Shouldn't Caldwell… it seems not all rumors were true… they promoted Sheppard. Atlantis. Would there be more pool-parties? Or Jumper-races? How does one fly a Puddle-Jumper? Funny name: __**Puddle**__-Jumper. Who came up with it?'_

_Evan couldn't get a grip on his thoughts. The only thing that his mind did gather was one single information: Atlantis._

_Oops. The General seemed to wait for an answer._

"_Yes Sir! Thank you Sir!"_

_Perhaps the General would have hoped for something more eloquent but since Evan didn't gather a thing of what had been said he kept it scantily. Landry didn't seemed surprised. Evan had been using this technique for years whenever he didn't want to give anything away._

"_Well Major come and meet your new commanding officer." With this word Landry opened the door. "Come in Colonel."_

"_General, Major." Sheppard greeted. _

"_Sir!"_

"_At ease Major." Sheppard looked him up as curious as Evan was feeling but he didn't let it show and wore a blank expression. Sheppard looked him in the eye for some time as if he was looking for something. Then – you could have overlooked it – he nodded contentedly._

"_Well, Major, I'm looking forward to our collaboration."_

"_Thank you, Sir!" Evan did allow himself a small smile._

"_We will be meeting tomorrow morning in the conference room at 0800. Are there any questions you'd like to ask yet?_

_Evan was positively surprised. Such an admission wasn't taken for granted. His mind however was still in shock and much to his own horror he heard himself ask: "Sir, who came up with the name 'Puddle-Jumper'?"_

_Sheppard grinned from ear to ear and beamed to him. "Well, Major, that was me. Can you imagine that McKay wanted to call them Gate-ships?_

"_No, Sir! Gate-ships, Sir?" Evan was back in control of himself and just is the corner of his mouth was switching._

"_Unbelievable isn't it? Well Major now I _am _looking forward to our meeting tomorrow!"_

Evan smiled remembering their first real meeting up until then he had just seen him in the mess hall or when they met by random in the corridors of the SGC.

They had arrived at the village by now which was completely abandoned by the look of it. But better be careful than sorry, so they entered it carefully always backing each other up. Hopefully they would get to know what happened to the missing team now. With rising hope Evan led his own men forward.


	4. Slipping and falling

**AN:** Thank you all very much for your encouraging reviews :-))

Enjoy.

* * *

When Evan and his men had arrived at the village, he tried once more to contact the missing team before setting to search the abandoned buildings.

"Colonel Sheppard this is Lorne please come in." Again there was no reply and sighing, Evan began to give his orders.

"Split up but stay close…" He stopped when he noticed that Pvt. Cain was not looking at him but seemed to focus on something else, his head slightly cocked.

"Cain – was is it?" He addressed the private.

"Sir, I think I heard something."

"What was it?" Evan felt the adrenalin rushing through his body. 'Perhaps it was them. Please, let that be John.'

"I'm not quite sure, Sir."

Now everybody was listening intently. 'There! Some distant yelling - wasn't it?'

Without further order the team was cautiously rushing towards the noise and coming nearer Evan clearly heard the voices of his brother, McKay, Teyla and Ronon shouting "Here! We're here!"

Evan came to a sliding stop in front of a hole in the ground.

"John! Thank God!" Evan exclaimed relieved. Peering into the rather deep and wide hole, more than ten feet deep by the look of it he caught the sight of John who looked at him with a raised eyebrow a question evident in his eyes. Trying to cover his slip he corrected himself at once and added, "Colonel glad to see you again." Now he sound much more composed. "What happened?" his voice not portraying more than appropriate concern.

"Well..." Sheppard began "McKay had us _summoned_ here because he thought he had detected some _interesting technology_..."

"Oh for…" McKay cut in, "How was I to know that there was a pitfall, I wonder?"

Evan could see Teyla looking at McKay decidedly calm, where as Ronon was leaning against the wall a stoic look on his face but giving some rather resentful glances towards McKay, who was clearly animated, while John seemed composed and restless at the same time.

'Surely not being able to get his team out of this mess by himself must have unsettled him.'

"McKay," John addressed his friend annoyed. "I clearly remember asking you if you secured the area..."

"Yeah, well, I thought you were speaking of villagers or wraith and as you can clearly see there are none of those around."

It was obvious what had been going on these last hours Evan chuckled along with his men who were readying themselves to get John and his team out.

"What happened to the radio, sir?" Evan wondered.

"McKay left his on the ground instead of securing it and managed to crush mine during the fall…"

Looking around Evan noticed a radio on a stone nearby. 'So that was how they knew it was us looking for them.'

"I'll have you know Sheppard," McKay huffed. "That given the height of the drop there was no time to influence the outcome of my landing. Everyone capable of basic physics can tell you as much!"

"Rodney!" Teyla cut in. "The colonel was only explaining why the major wasn't able to reach us over the radio." On the continuing banter Ronon's look at McKay seemed to get slightly more irritated.

'I better stop this,' mused Evan. 'before McKay gets strangled.'

"Sir, we'll be right back," he said out loud. "Surely there will be something in this village to get you out of there."

'Just get your brother and the others out. There are no broken bones or sprained angles they could just walk back arriving at Atlantis in time for dinner.' With the knot in his stomach finally gone Evans was in high spirits and with no foe in sight he allowed himself to relax. While they were roaming through the houses he could hear Stackhouse and Cain still sniggering.

"Watch your steps!" Evan pointed out "I wouldn't like it if I had to pull you out of another pothole!"

"Yes, sir!"

"Surely, sir!" They replied struggling to answer while they were laughing.

It didn't take long to find some ropes and they headed back to the others to get them out. First Teyla than McKay, Ronon and finally John.

Evan looked up his brother once more, searching for injuries. John had some bruises, alright, but otherwise he seemed fine. Well, maybe a little embarrassed?

"Did Weir send you?" John asked.

"We were worried because there hadn't been any contact," Evan admitted slipping once more, but this time John didn't seem to notice.

"Well I'm glad. I started to wonder if we'd have to stay the night. I'll have to thank her. I wasn't expecting a search party so soon."

"Weren't you, sir? We knew you sure would've sent one if roles were reversed."

"You know me well, don't you?" John offered one of his rare, shy smiles.

'Not as well as I liked.' Evan thought an ordered himself, 'Now! Do it!'

"I wonder if you'd like to drown today's 'experience' tonight?" he asked.

"A beer tonight? Count me in, Major. Now let's get ready to leave. I'm getting hungry and besides, if I remember correctly, there will be blue Jell-O with the dinner tonight…."

They started gathering all the equipment with McKay frowning at his crushed laptop. "Oh no, look at that. It took me days so configure it as I need it. Now I have to do it all again. Hopefully I'll be able to save the data."

Naturally John felt the need to reply and while this renewed banter amused Evans team it was obvious that Ronon and Teyla had experienced enough of it during the last hours. Smirking Evan bent down to pick of the last piece of equipment from the edge of the pitfall while at the same time McKay took a step backwards, upset by John's last comment on their banter without paying attention to his surroundings.

"McKay!" Snapped John trying to grab his arm to prevent him from running into Even only to get McKay backing away and colliding with Evan.

Evan felt himself plunging head first into the pitfall the alarmed shouts of his comrades ringing in his ears. Reaching the soil much too fast for his liking while oddly enough he thought, 'McKay was right, its basic physics,' and then, 'so much for sharing a beer and getting to know your brother better' before everything went black.


	5. Worrying

**AN:** The POV is changing several times in this chapter: it's "Evan" whenever I try to tell the story from his POV otherwise it's "Lorne".

* * *

Evan noticed something soft beneath him and felt himself tangled in blankets. Was he at the sick bay? Something seemed off, his left side was tingling and feeling strange and on top of it he had a pressing feeling that he had to be somewhere, find someone - someone very important to him, but whom? Think Evan! This is important! John, he had to find John! John was his brother, and his brother needed him. But why? He couldn't remember. All he could remember was he needed to find John. Restless, Evan fought to think clearly but his brain remained foggy leaving him anxious, least he managed to pry his eyes open and. Blinking at the blazing lights of the infirmary, he could see his men sitting by his bedside. Good! He could always rely on them.

"Stackhouse! Cain!" Evan was now desperately trying to get up. "We'll have to find John! The Colonel, that is. His team's missing."

He noticed both men were looking at him worriedly.

"Easy, sir!" Stackhouse replied trying to ease him down again and added, "Cain, go get Carson!" at which the other man hurried away at once.

"Sir, remember we found them. You got them all out and they're all back safely."

"He's safe?"

"That's right, sir. The Colonel is safe."

Relieved, Evan felt himself drifting back to sleep.

SGASAGASGA

Cain returned with Carson hot on his heals.

"Major! Can you hear me?" The doc asked, concerned for his patient.

"I'm afraid he drifted back to sleep once more," Stackhouse told Carson.

"Has the vomiting returned?"

"No. Thank God for that." Stackhouse sighed.

First, much to their dismay, Carson had put on a heart monitor due to some cardiac irregularity endangered by the brain trauma. And then the expected vomiting wouldn't stop.

"Well at least that's something." Carson got out his little flashlight and checked the pupils of the Major and the heart monitor.

"Did he remember what we told him when he awakened last time?"

"I'm afraid not. Cain and I are worried about him. You see, he keeps being restless, always distraught to find Sheppard and his team."

That caught Carson attention. "Why didn't you tell me earlier, that he's worried for… them!" he exclaimed, catching himself in time. Before he would have been giving the brothers away.

Cain and Stackhouse looked at each other. "_But_ we told you he is restless!"

"Yes you did, but… never mind." Carson hurried away to the intercom "Colonel Sheppard, this is Carson."

"Sheppard here. Carson how is the Major? Everything alright?"

"Colonel, could you please come to the infirmary?"

"I'll be there right away."

He turned to find Cain and Stackhouse directly behind him with a questing look in their eyes.

"Since the Major is worried for the Colonel and his team I think it'll help if he'd see them for himself the next time, so he'll stop worrying and will be able to get some actual rest to recover from his trauma."

Both men nodded their agreement, then, suddenly startled, they exclaimed as one, "NOT McKay!"

Cain added, "We don't like him to be anywhere near the Major!"

Sure enough the Colonel had already told the scientist off after McKay, horrified by the outcome of his actions, had done anything in his power to help getting Lorne out of the hole and back to Atlantis but Cain and Stackhouse couldn't risk him adding to the harm already done to their CO and friend.

The Major was already miserable enough without the possibility of triggering bad memories from the planet. Although he knew McKay was very worried for Lorne, Carson was sure keeping McKay out would be the right thing to do. When Lorne was brought in, McKay had wanted to stay together with the rest of the team but Carson had to shoo them out in order to get the Major the much needed rest. Now he was sure Sheppard's sole presence would be able to put Lorne at ease. Unfortunately back then his duties had kept the Colonel away, otherwise the Major would likely be resting peaceful by now. Somehow his shaken up brain currently seemingly clung to the need to protect his brother, which of course Carson would try to diffuse to anyone so Lorne could tell Sheppard on his own terms. Surely both men would let in their teams later on since he knew they trusted them implicitly, but first of all this was something highly private between both men.

"I understand. So McKay will be kept off the infirmary."

"Thank you, Doc!" Stackhouse and Cain replied gratefully.

It was just then Sheppard joined them and being greeted militarily with a, "Sir!" from Stackhouse and Cain and a much more informal, "Ah Colonel, there you are," by Carson.

"Stackhouse. Cain. So how is Lorne, Doc?"

"Alas, like I told you when he came in Colonel, the Major suffered a traumatic brain injury and is therefore having some cardiac irregularity along with retrograde amnesia so he can't remember bringing you back safely and is anxious to find and rescue you. Cain and Stackhouse told me that he's all worked up about you."

Sheppard looked at the Major thoughtfully taking in his worn out appearance along with the palpable exhaustion, knowing by experience what a concussion felt like even if he himself always pretended to feel 'just fine' in order to escape the infirmary. Much to his dismay this wasn't 'just a concussion' but much more severe and he felt his anger rising once more. He could wring McKay's neck! Today that man had clearly outdone himself but, moreover, Sheppard was worried for Lorne besides his injury – it wasn't like him to pay so less attention to his surroundings that McKay could catch him by surprise in the first place. Then there had been the incident with the shirt this morning, which back then he had just thought funny, though looking back now, it should have been his first clue of something being amiss. Also Lorne calling him 'John' when he found them was rather odd. As soon as possible he would have to talk to his second in command and worm everything out of him. He sighed. He didn't like this one bit, none of it, but he had always felt that he could rely on the Major and they were working together just fine although he knew next to nothing about his private life. Perhaps he'd change that. Maybe sharing a beer as they'd wanted to before the plunge.

Out loud he said, "I'll stay with him if you think it'll help."

"Well, I'm quite certain it will make a difference that you'll stay with him." Little did Sheppard know how loaded Carson's seemingly harmless statement was.

"Thank you, sir!" Stackhouse and Cain hoped seeing the Colonel for himself would put the Major at ease on an ongoing basis when he awoke next time.

"Why don't you two get some rest?" Sheppard offered.

They shared a look. Fortunately this was precisely what they had discussed earlier. While their team leader was always someone who looked out for the others, today had been different because, although Lorne had tried to hide it, they knew him too well by now not to notice him being more concerned about the Colonel's team than usually. Then, as they finally found the missing team, he called Sheppard 'John'. Something was up but since obviously the Colonel wasn't in the loop they decided to keep it at that. They wouldn't betray the trust the Major had in them by exposing him. Furthermore they'd try to shield him to ensure the Major didn't let slip anything in his current state and so it was silently agreed not to let the Major on his own, meaning alone with the Colonel.

"Thank you, sir. But we'd like to stay here and watch out for him," Stackhouse answered. The double meaning going unnoticed by everyone but Cain who added, "That's right, sir!"

Settling themselves again in the chairs they had pulled up along the bed the three men busied themselves quietly while they were waiting.

Twenty minutes later Stackhouse and Cain anew shared a look when Lorne was getting restless again as they could by now easily tell by just some little movements he made. Sure enough Lorne began to toss around and mumble something while he became more and more agitated.

"Everything's fin, sir. We're back on Atlantis. Everyone is safe." Stackhouse and Cain quickly tried to soothe him but weren't as successful as they liked.

When Lorne became more distressed, Sheppard also tried to calm him down, "Major, everything's okay. Calm down."

Evan heard voices trying to reassure him and then there was a new voice. John's voice. John! He was here. "Oh thank God. I was so worried." Knowing his brother was safe all panic left him and he drifted off into a much needed peaceful sleep.

Stackhouse and Cain breathed out a sigh of relief when, upon hearing Sheppard's voice, their friend calmed down immediately while the Colonel looked a bit astonished and also relieved that he had been able to calm down the Major so easily. Thankfully the Major had now drifted into a deep sleep and looked peaceful for the first time.

Ronon and Teyla came by and, true to his word, Carson kept McKay out of the sick bay. "Now Rodney the Major need peace and I fear hearing your voice will trigger bad memories. I know you didn't want any of this to happen. At least the Major was able to drift off to the restful sleep he needs. I tell you if there are any news." With these words Carson showed McKay out.

"How is the Major?" Teyla addressed Carson.

"Finally sound asleep and getting some rest now. He kept being worried for you but I think now he knows everyone's home safely."

"I'm glad to hear such good news."

"Yeah well, but there's still his brain trauma," Sheppard said somewhat miserably.

"Sir!" Stackhouse had picked up the Colonel's guilt "There is nothing you could have done! You helped him a great deal by staying with him and calming him down. Believe me we tried on our own but it wasn't before you came that he believed and remembered so it is thanks to you the Major is now able to rest."

Cain nodded to this, he didn't blame the Colonel for anything either and was grateful he had been able to calm Lorne down.

While Ronon gave Sheppard a look which said as much as 'Told you so!', Sheppard relaxed somewhat but they could clearly see that he still blamed himself for bantering with McKay in the first place and, unknown to Stackhouse and Cain but not to Ronon and Teyla, as well for not noticing something being up with Lorne. Knowing now that his presence at the infirmary indeed made a difference to Lorne he made himself comfortable again, determined to help as much as he could.

* * *

**AN:** I believe Lorne's Team would worry about him as much as Sheppard's for him. So I had them hanging out at the infirmary waiting for him to come around.

I tried to picture Lorne with TBI grade 2, I'm not a medicine but I hope it'll pass.


	6. What happend?

**AN **Thanks to everybody who reviewed and encouraged me :-)) And thanks again to my beta June odyssee.

* * *

Slowly the rising sun immersed the sick bay in its pallid light illuminating the scene of three men slumped over in their seats sound asleep near a bed in the corner.  
Evan stirred as the sun finally reached his eyes, irritating him until he could no longer ignore it and, only half aware, he pried his eyes open just to shield them at once with his right arm, finding the light far too bright for comfort. Taking another risk, he recognized, resting in seats pulled up along his bedside, his teammates as well as the Colonel. That was odd. 'Why was _he _here?' He wouldn't be surprised if the Colonel had just walked by but it appeared to him that he had been with him all night. 'Sh…! My head is killing me.' He lay back, shielding his eyes with his right arm once more and wanted to cover his head with the other but… his left arm was is a cast? 'Why's that?' Evan wondered. 'Why haven't I noticed before?' He then perceived his whole left side tingling. 'What the heck happened?' Evan tried to focus. 'I'd been here in sick bay talking with Carson after the Colonel had been released. Carson had then introduced me to his research and … oh, oho… Wow!' Memory hit him. 'The Colonel's my brother!' Stunned by this recollected discovery, Evan risked opening his eyes to glance at him. John sure looked worn out. 'Does he know? Is that's why he's here?' Not able to bear the light any longer, Evan closed his eyes again while he tried his best to come to a conclusion of what happened despite his fuzzy mind and his headache. 'As it seemed I have been in some kind of accident and if John is here with me in sick bay then at some point Carson must it have found it necessary to inform John that we are brothers or hadn't he?' Evan didn't know what to make of it and tried to figure it out once more. 'With me as XO out of the picture John would have to pull my workload in addition to his own so there must be a good reason for him obviously spending the night with me in sick bay. In the past John had never held wake at my sickbed as I had never done at his. So when John isn't with me as my CO than he would be as a brother much as I would have. Does this mean that John had accepted me as his brother?' He remembered not knowing how to approach John on that matter so he should be glad it had been taken out of his hands but he felt rather betrayed. Not by Carson, he trusted him to have had a really good reason for telling John, but he felt bereft of the chance to tell John himself. This was something highly personal and it had been taken out of his hands. He sighed and shifted in his bed with obviously now didn't go unnoticed by the others as he could hear rustling and other noises so now probably his brother and his team were waking up. Once more he peeled his eyes open while trying to shield them of the majority of the light.

"Major, how are you?" John addressed him, his face showing concern although he tried to hide it. Stackhouse and Cain had a similar expression on their faces.

"It's good to have you back, Major!" Stackhouse said while Cain added: "How's your head, sir?"

"Peachy," replied Evan with a strained smile.

It only took a minute for Carson to arrive. "Ah lad, I'm glad you've woken up. You had us a wee bit worried here. So how are you?"

"My head feels as if it's exploding any time soon. Tell me what happened, doc?"

"Um, it seems you're still suffering from retrograde amnesia."

"You fell down head first into quite a deep pitfall," John cut in.

"What pit fall?" Evan wondered.

"Well, Weir sent your team on a search and rescue mission for, um, for me and my team," John explained. "You were able to get us out of a pitfall but you then fell in head first yourself."

"I fell in? Head first?"

"It was an accident."

"Some accident. Damn McKay," Evan could hear Stackhouse mutter.

"It was an accident, Sergeant," John said firmly.

"Oh, well," Stackhouse backed off. "I didn't mean to imply that he did it on purpose."

Evan looked at them confused. "Why would he do that?"

"He wouldn't. That's why I told you it was an accident!"

"Um, okay," Evan still hadn't a clue what happened but he'd ask them later—later when he was feeling better, hopefully much better.

"Major," Carson addressed him once more. "Is the light troubling you?"

"Um, yeah."

Immediately he could hear Carson ordering one of the nurses to dim the lights while John arranged for Atlantis to darken the windowpanes and much to his relief his area of the sick bay was now dim lighted.

"Thanks," Evan mumbled.

"Now, Major you're confined to bed until further notice."

Evan saw the others wincing sympathetically.

"I'll give you a proper medical as soon as everybody here has returned to their daily duties. Remember the Major still needs to rest." With that Carson left them alone.

"So you don't remember anything from that mission?" John asked.

"I'm afraid so."

"Don't rack your brain. I'm sure you'll remember soon, sir," Cain assured.

As much as he liked his team members and appreciated them spending the night obviously worrying for him, right now Evan wished he could have some minutes in private with his brother but it dawned on him that the chance was slim as long as he had to stay in sick bay. Sure enough the three of them left together a few moments later. Also he had the feeling that John had been eying him strangely though he wasn't sure if he read him right or was overreacting.

SGASGASGA

Some days later he had been released and, true to his prediction, without a chance to speak to John in private. Instead he had a rather exhausting talk in private with McKay, reassuring the man over and over again that he didn't hold him responsible for his accident while desperately wishing for _anybody _to come by to put him out of that misery. McKay certainly felt horrible as much as he could see and when he came by the first time his team had giving him a cold shoulder along with hostile glances but as it seemed they now had it worked out for which Evan was grateful.

Due to his broken arm and the head trauma he had been put on sick leave for several weeks. Now he was on his way to his brother's quarters to hopefully pick him up for the beer he had remembered they agreed in sharing after the mission gone wrong. Evan chimed arriving at John's quarters. When John opened the doors he looked at him questioningly.

"I, um, I wanted to invite you to the beer we've been talking about."

"Oh, um, sure. So, now?"

"Well I think now is as good as anytime or did you have plans already?"

"No. Now's fine."

"Fine."

'Well that went rather well, slightly awkward but otherwise quite well.'

Since John was still in BDU Lorne asked,

"Um, you want to change first?"

"Um?" John gazed down apparently only now noticing his BDU. "Nah, it's fine with me."

'Of course', Evan thought. He could hardly remember a time were John had been wearing civvies.

"So, where to?"

"Well, spending my last days at sick bay, I'd like to sit outside. So how about the west pier?"

"Good idea."

They were talking about random stuff along the way and had made themselves comfortable when they arrived. Their feet dangling from the pier and glancing at the slowly setting sun, Evan handed John one of the bottles while he took another one for himself and noticing the label, John quirked an eyebrow at him.

"Well, I'm not allowed to any alcohol right now. But Carson provided me with these ones."

"Carson provided you?"

"Yeah, well you know I mentioned I wanted to ask you out on a beer and so he offered. Apparently I'm not the first released patient he provided with alcohol-free beer. Turned out he made a special request. Seems we have to read more carefully what we sign up fort if we want to stay in the loop." He smiled over this matter.

Evan felt the nervousness returning, his stomach seemed to have folded itself in a knot. Before he could work himself in a full-blown panic he decided to come straight to the point about their new-found kinship. After all, he'd faced Wraith so, clearly, he'd be able to face his own brother, right?

"So you're okay with **it**?" Evan came out. 'Well done Evan!' he told himself. 'Really eloquent!'

Much to his astonishment John answered with a rather unperturbed "Sure." While giving his beer a once over.

Whatever Evan had pictured John's reaction to be it surely had been anything but this. John truly seemed totally at ease with it whereas Evan was totally flabbergasted. Then again he had a few days to get over the first shock, Evan mused. After all it had been a week since his accident and Carson telling him.

They drank their beers in silence until Evan continued both watching the calming waves steadily hitting the pier.

"I don't know how to tell our mom."

"Why's that?" John asked with evident surprise in his voice.

"Well it's not some news you want to spring on anyone."

"I'm sure they had worse with you," John answered with a smirk.

"Well I'm glad you are at so ease with it, as I assumed you'd , um, feel run down, you see it had me freaking out when Carson told me."

Now John gave him his full attention eying him concerned, wrinkling his forehead.

"Well, I can't just write in my next email. 'Hi Mom! How's things? Oh by the way our family's increasing. You know my CO, I told you about him, John Sheppard well guess' what? He's my brother, or should I say your son!'"

Choking, John spit his beer on the pier. "What?!"

* * *

**AN** Sorry for this cliff hanger. I planed posting the 7th chapter at the same date but I decided to rework it.


	7. Bonding

**AN** Sorry for that cliff-hanger and thank you all again for your encouraging rewies. I'm glad you likes it so far.

Again this chaper was betaed thanks to June odyssee :-)

* * *

Johns POV

After a long tiring day with Lorne out of duty, John was finally back to his quarters. With the added workload he had worked long hours, and these days would go on for some weeks. Carson hadn't declared Evan to be fit for duty or, more precisely, desk duty thanks to his broken arm. He stated it would put the Major under too much stress and pressure which would hinder his brain from recovering properly or trigger cardiac disorder. But at least Lorne had been released from sick bay today. Although John had visited him throughout the week, there never seemed to be the right moment to approach him to get to the bottom of whatever it was that had his XO gotten so distraught lately. Neither he nor his team had told the Major that John had obviously been the only one who had been able to put him at ease that first night. As for him, he preferred it that way, and if he was reading the Major's team right so did they. John sighed while he considered what to do. It would be easier if he just had a clue of what was going on. Engrossed in thoughts, he almost didn't hear the chiming of his door. Opening it, he was faced with the very man he'd been thinking about.

"I, um, I wanted to invite you to the beer we've been talking about," Lorne addressed him.

Oh, he'd forgotten that one. Apparently he got lucky. No awkward fumbling for an excuse to speak to his XO in private. Yup, he just got lucky but then again he didn't look forward to it too much, because this wouldn't just be him hanging out with the Major – which he would enjoy – but, much to his dismay, it would be more like a serious talk. So he answered rather reluctantly:

"Oh, um sure. So, now?"

"Well I think now is as good as anytime, or did you have plans already?"

"No. Now's fine."

"Great."

"Um, you want to change first?"

"Um?" Changing? John gazed down, taking in his BDU. Since he was based at Atlantis he hardly ever bothered to change anymore for being of duty didn't meant there being no incidents or crisis' claiming his attention that were better not faced in civvies. "Na, it's fine with me."

"So where to?" John asked.

"Well, spending my last days at sick bay, I'd like to sit outside. So how about the west pier?"

The west pier was actually a good idea. They'd get some fresh air and be able to talk in private whereas in the mess chances would be rather slim and so he agreed, "Good idea."

SGASGA

Now there they were, comfortable with their feet dangling from the pier and glancing at the ocean. Perhaps this wouldn't be too hard or awkward after all. Lorne handed him one of the beers he had carried along. Reaching for it, John noticed the label and couldn't stop himself from quirking an eyebrow at his XO.

"Well, I'm not allowed to any alcoholics right now. But Carson provided me with these ones," Lorne explained.

"Carson provided you?"

"Yeah, well you know I mentioned I wanted to ask you out on a beer and so he offered. Apparently I'm not the first released patient he provided with alcohol-free beer. Turned out he made a special request. Seems we have to read more carefully what we sign up if we want to stay in the loop," Lorne explained, smiling and John chuckled with him. Well, well! Carson really cared for his patients.

"So you're okay with **it**?"

"Sure." Giving his beer a once over, John wondered why the Major seemed to think it was beneath him to have an alcohol-free beer.

After quietly enjoying the evening for some time, John was wondering how to bring his concerns up when Lorne spoke again, "I don't know how to tell our mom."

"Why's that?" John asked with evident surprise in his voice. Sure, he didn't know Lorne's family but whenever he'd been talking about them they came across to him at the kind you got along with fairly easy just as the Major himself. Other than his own family they supported their son in his career choice and he couldn't imagine them giving Lorne a hard time over a broken arm. Wasn't his mother an art teacher? His own Mom had also liked to paint. His father even had someone build her an atelier in their house. He had liked sitting there watching her and chattering along. She had always listened to his thoughts, ideas and dreams.

"Well it's not some news you want to spring on anyone."

Huh? John had to pull himself out of his memories. Seemingly, this truly bothered Lorne and to lighten the mood he answered crooked smile, "I'm sure they had worse with you."

"Well I'm glad you are at so ease with it, as I assumed you'd, um, feel run down. It had me freaking out when Carson told me."

Now John gave him his full attention eyeing him concerned, wrinkling his forehead. Perhaps there was more than just the broken arm? There wouldn't be any permanent damage due to his head trauma? Na, Carson would've informed him since he was the Major's CO. John calmed himself.

"Well, I can't just email, 'Hi Mom! How's things? Oh by the way, our family's increasing. You know my CO, told ya about him, John Sheppard? Well guess' what? He's my brother or should I say your son!'"

Choking, John spit his beer on the pier. "WHAT?!"

Nothing had him prepared for this! He looked wide eyed at the Major who for his part seemed to look at him in shock. Now, shouldn't that be his part? He wondered. Then it occurred to him, it must be the trauma! No wonder Carson insisted the Major not being fit for duty. Getting a grip, he said, "Um, Lorne. Um, are you feeling well? I don't know how to tell you but, um, you know…" He didn't have the chance to finish his sentence.

"OH GOD! I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to… I thought you knew! You had been keeping watch… See, I thought that was because Carson told you! And then you kept coming around the week… I was so sure… I didn't even check it with Carson… Oh God, I'm so sorry John!" Lorne's eyes were full of regret. "I… I never wanted to tell you this way," he continued quietly.

"I..." John didn't know what to do, how to react. But apparently the Major was determined on doing all the talking. He decided to hear him out, perhaps this way it would be easier later. He hadn't a clue how to take this on right now anyway.

"Um, well you see, some weeks ago Carson explained to me the research he was doing. He's studying the ATA-gene and to explain his research to me he compared my ATA-gene with yours and, finding the results odd, he did a complete comparison of our DNA…."

John gaped at his XO. Now _this_ didn't sound like some crazy talking caused by some head trauma. He was getting into a shock. It just couldn't be, his mother was dead! And he said as much. "Lorne, um, I… look, my mother is dead. There must be some mistake along the way…"

"John…" Lorne began. Almost unconsciously, John registered himself not bothering any longer which way his XO addressed him.

"…Um, well you see my mother, um, our mother had been in an accident before she met my father. You know, up to today she doesn't remember anything from before."

"I, um, I see." But he didn't. Right now he didn't know what to think.

"I have something for you…" Lorne – or was it Evan? – addressed him gently. John turned to the other man and saw that he was holding a picture which he handed him without a word.

It was a photo of a woman laughing about something. No, not just a woman. Sure she looked older, but he would have recognized her anywhere.

"Mom!" John breathed out. Memories flooded his mind; his mom listening to his ideas, tucking him in, hugging him when he was upset and along with them, his emotions bottled up for years raised to the surface. The last memory to come was of his grief at her funeral where they had to bury an empty coffin since they hadn't been able to find her body. Lost at sea they had told him. God, she was alive! ALIVE!

John's mind didn't know how to process this. He never noticed that he had risen nor that he had started running, running down the pier, running away from his brother whom he left standing there not knowing whether to follow him or not. His feet carried him further and further until he was finally running out of power drained from his run and further more emotionally burned out. Slipping to the ground, he leaned against the wall.

He didn't know how much time had passed when he heard footsteps approaching. John winced, he didn't want for anybody to see him in this state. The footsteps came to halt right in front of him and looking up, he met Evan's troubled eyes watching him ruefully.

"Come on, John," Evan addressed him gently "Best get you to your quarters."

With that he put out his hand and John let his brother helping him to his feet and to his quarters. Since it was long after hours they were lucky and didn't run into anybody. As much as John hated to be seen in the state he was in, he strangely didn't wanted Evan to leave him. God, he was a mess.

"Can you tell me about her? Um, Mom I mean?" John asked almost shyly.

And so the two brothers were united in the peace of the quarters. One telling his memories and the other listening and clinging to everything his little brother shared with him. Neither of them noticing the growing darkness after the sun had settled down. At some point they both slipped into sleep, the older brother skidding down the bed head on which he had leaned whereas the younger one had folded himself into the armchair.

**AN **

Hopefully you liked the way I pictured their talk. I didn't want this story getting too dark but then again I couldn't picture Sheppard just shrugging it off or burying it at once.


	8. Back on earth

**AN** By the way, I looked up the meaning of "Evan" and it said it is "little warrior". ;-)) Surely someone had a sense of humor when they decided on the given name for Lorne's character.

* * *

Sarah Lorne was checking her email in the hopes of finding one from her son. And because today was one of those good days, she all but yelled for her husband. "Get over here, quick! There's a mail from Evan!"

Shortly, she could already hear Martin hurrying over.

"Have you read it already?" he demanded, bolting though the door.

Her indignant reply came in a heartbeat, "I would _never_ do that!"

But now that Martin was with her, she immediately clicked to open it and both began to read.

"Hey, that's good news!" Martin exclaimed "We have to tell Julie and Tom!"

Sarah agreed. She was as excited as her husband that Evan was coming home for a few days, but when she reread the mail, she frowned. "Something's off."

"What do you mean, something's off? Our son is coming home and we just read his very cheerful mail?"

"That's just it!"

"I don't follow you."

"It's much too cheerful. When Evan is really cheerful it's different in his letters…."

"Aren't you are over thinking this?"

"No, I'm telling you, something's off!"

SGASAGSGA

After weeks on the Daedalus, several hours at the SGC, a flight, and a nearly finished train ride, Evan was nervously looking forward to meet his family. But, it wasn't any longer just_ his_ family now, wasn't it? And right there laid the problem, since he didn't know how to tell them.

As the train came to halt, he grabbed is duffel bag with his good arm and fell in line with the other passengers ready to exit the train. Slowly he was getting nearer to the door while he saw the people on the platform through the windows. Some of the passengers were hurrying along the gate eager to get away, others were looking around for their loved ones and some were already being welcomed back.

Throughout his years in the service his family had made sure one of them would be there to pick him up every time. Sure enough as soon as he stepped down to the platform he could hear his mother shouting, "Evan!" as is parents were pushing themselves through the crowd.

"Welcome home!" his parents said while they pulled him into a hug.

"Hi Mom, hi Dad!" Evan always enjoyed these family moments.

"What have you done with your arm?" his mother wanted to know. "I thought you just had a few days of, but you're on sick leave!"

"Yeah, sorry... I fell into a hole, broke my arm, got a concussion…"

"Is your head okay now?" His father asked.

"I'm fine, but no active duty or even desk duty for now."

"No desk duty either? You're holding back Evan. Your concussion was really bad, now wasn't it?" His mother immediately got to the bottom of it.

"Um.."

"Ha, don't you even try to tell me otherwise!"

"Wouldn't dream of it," Evan mumbled. He had long since learned that he couldn't fool his mother about any injuries he received, neither as a child and nor as an adult. Sometimes he tried with telling half true's so as today, but look how far he got!

His father got hold of his duffel bag. "Give this to me. I'll carry it. So you fell into a hole? How's that? You never tended to stupid accidents, surely there is more to this story."

For a short time Evan considered not telling his father, he was still embarrassed about that incident. He should have paid attention to his surroundings. They had been off-world. He was lucky they hadn't been some enemy stalking up to them. He feared he wouldn't have noticed.

SGASGASGA

The next morning Evan awoke to the sun on his face and a soft purr in his ear. Turning his head, he found himself eye to eye with Tiger, the family cat. For a short while he just laid there, enjoying the fact that he didn't _have_ to get up. There wasn't some emergency waiting, no meeting to attend. He ruffled Tiger behind his ears and the purring became louder as the cat stretched himself contentedly. Yawning, Evan climbed out of bed and untangled himself from his blanket, carefully trying not to disturb the cat. But despite his efforts, Tiger got on his paws, looking at him reproachfully before he sauntered away.

With his broken arm Evan had some difficulties getting ready but he was getting more and more practice. He decided on jeans and a shirt, which he had cut the left arm off of, and made his way to the kitchen, where he knew his parents would be waiting with breakfast.

"Morning!" he greeted on entering the large room. Besides the cooking area there was a big kitchen table with a seating area close to the window. His mother had painted some floral motives at the wall close to the table. He remembered them painting it. The fading one of it was painted by himself as a child and, treasured by his family it had survived all repainting during the years. His mother had always managed to integrate it into the new decoration.

"Ah, there you are. Did you sleep well?"

"Yeah, thanks."

Eagerly, Evan gripped for a large mug to pull himself some coffee which had his father quirking an eyebrow at him.

"Still short for coffee on your base?" he commented dryly.

"You bet! If I'd tell you what they are serving as surrogate-coffee you wouldn't believe me!"

"Try me!"

"Sorry, dad, classified."

"You really want to believe me your type of surrogate-coffee is _classified_?!"

"Yep!" Evan grinned.

"Would you like some pancakes, Evan?" his mother wanted to know. "I've already made some for your dad and me."

"You just made my day, mom." Evan sighed contentedly.

"Well, everything for my children…" His mother winked had him and then frowned, when Evan cringed at her words. She had been right. Something was off!

Evan enjoyed his meal and the company of his parents as he put on a light conservation telling them of funny moments on Atlantis that weren't classified. Later on they cleaned up the kitchen together, and settled over to the living room.

Deciding that there was no good in delaying _it_, Evan went to his room to get his picture of John before rejoining his parents.

"Mom, dad, I have to tell you something," he began slowly.

"Something is wrong, isn't it Evan? I feared as much!" His parents exchanged worried glances. Well, his mother eyes more of giving his father a 'told you so!' look which Evan caught as well so he asked more turned to his mother, "How could you tell?" Had he been so obvious? He had put so much effort in not worrying them and holding things back not letting it show or slip.

"Well, I know you. I had my suspicions when I took a closer look at your mail," his mother informed him.

"My mail? But I tried to write it lightly!" Evan exclaimed.

"And that's why I knew – you tried too much! Is there more to your accident?" His mother added concerned for his well being, only partly relieved when Evan shook his head no. So there must be something else. Knowing her son, it must be something serious.

"So what is it, son?" His father asked. "You know, you can tell us everything, don't you?"

"I know, Dad…. um well, you know, um… I've met someone who knew you before your accident, Mom…" Evan began awkwardly.

"Her accident?" His father asked puzzled "But your mother hadn't had an accident lately… oh, _that_ accident…" his father fell silent while his mother looked at him stunned.

After a minute she asked quietly, hesitantly, "Who? Did he know me well?"

"Yeah Mom, he knew you very well, although he was just a little boy back then."

Sarah Lorne didn't know what to make of this fact – a child? A boy, that still remembered her? She looked at her husband's equally astonished face and back at her son's earnest features, but she needed reassurance. "A little boy? And he can still remember me? You're sure there was no mistake?"

"I'm sure, mom. I'd like to show you a picture of him, I'm sorry I only have an adult picture of him, but… um please… just take a look at it…" Evan fumbled for the picture he had tucked away handed it to his mother. Before he had embarked on the Daedalus, John and him had both decided that it would be a good idea if Evan took a picture of John with him and they both had poked through the little pack that was piled up at John's quarters. Since John wasn't someone to collect pictures of himself they had cut him out of a team picture some of the scientist had made on a visit to a befriended planet.

Sarah looked at the photo Evan gave her. It showed a man some years older than Evan, with brown, messy hair who smiled mischievously. Concentrating on his face and features, she tried to get know him, or better yet, to remember him. He did seem similar in looks. Not only did she like him at once, she felt distant memories and emotions coming to the surface that felt more like – love?! Jittery, she set up straight.

Evan and his father noticed her sudden movement and agitated face. Both closed in trying to comfort her. Evan felt helpless and worried for his mother. Especially knowing what was yet to come! How would she process all of this? Glancing at his father, he saw his concerns mirrored on his face. Until now his father had held back. He had always been that way in regard to his wife's amnesia, giving her comfort and strength without wrapping her and always letting her work things on her own time and in her own way. This was something Evan had admired more and more about his father when he had gotten old enough to fully understand the impact of his mother's amnesia.

"Evan, Martin, I can't remember him but… it's odd. I don't have any real memory, but… Evan, tell me, please, perhaps this question seems strange but I have a feeling…" She was troubled and gripped for her husband's hand for comfort, who returned the squeeze reassuringly. "Evan, was I close to that boy in some way?"

At that question Sarah noticed that her son's face lightning up and breaking into a huge smile.

"I'm so glad, mom! You don't know yet, but you'll understand and yeah, you loved him very much!" Evan was amazed. Their mother remembered John! Okay, not in detail, but she remembered her love for him. He heaved a sigh of relieve. If he knew John at all he would be over the moon for this precious gift, even if John could downplay his emotions pretty well. John would have been crushed if their mother hadn't remembered him at all. So, on his brother's behalf he was now much more at ease with this situation. If he'd still been a kid he would have made a winner's dance right there in the living room.

Happy for the less tension in the air from his son side but still worried for his wife, Martin had laid his arm around Sarah's shoulder, giving her comfort and strength. He was now able to take a closer look at the picture. The young man sure looked similar. He was in some kind of BDU, but there were no unit badge on it so he couldn't tell if he was in the same unit as Evan or even in the air force. He was also wondered why his son seemed so anxious in behalf of this man and so delighted about Sarah's reaction. But like all the years before when he had dealt with her amnesia he tried his hardest to give her the room she needed without interfering but without abandoning her on the matter either. So he decided to ask one of the presumable easier questions, "Evan? Um, is that one of your comrades? Is that were you met?"

"You could say so. I tell you all about it later but there are other things I have to tell you first. Mom? Are you ready for more?" Evan eyed his mother concerned.

Sarah felt like running away from this and throwing herself into it at the same time. Her head was spinning. She had been right. Oddly as it was to remember feelings without any clear memories of… she realized she didn't even know his name and exclaimed, "Of course! I want to know all of it! Maybe it will be hard, but I wanted to know for so long, and I get a felling I owe it to him." This was one of the few things she was absolutely certain of in her whirling mind. She made a gesture towards the picture, "What's his name?"

"John, his name is John"

'John. A nice name.' One she could herself imagine giving to a child.

Evan decided to tell her John point of view first. Perhaps it would be better if she connected the dots herself. After what he had done to his brother that evening on the pier – and was still beating himself up on it – he tried his hardest to make things as easy as he knew it for his mother and also his father. "Um, okay now, … for years now John believed you dead. He told me they thought you were lost at sea."

"Well I was found at sea…" Sarah's mind was working overtime. She wondered about John, about the little boy John whom she had loved, who still remembered her after all those years, grieved for her even, if she read Evan right.

"Evan?" Sarah was slowly piercing things together. "Evan? Are we related?" she asked anxiously. She noticed Evan nodding while his eyes showed more and more concern for her. The pieces of the puzzle came together and she choked out, "Is he… is he my son?"

Evan only nodded and pulled his mother into a hug. His father, as shocked as his mother, joining in.

Martin was appalled by this news. He could only imagine what this must have meant for John and his family. One of Sarah greatest fears had always been that she had left people – or worse children – behind mourning her loss. So now, at this moment, he had to pull himself together in order give his wife the much needed strength.

Sarah had begun to cry silently, overwhelmed by intense emotions caused by the realization of her rediscovered son, John, her heart arching for the misery she had caused him. Absorbing the comfort and strength of her husband and her son, her mind finally came more and more at ease and she slowly entangled herself a bit but the three of them were still holding another when Evan started to tell them more.

Evan told his parents everything John had told him, told his mother about David, about Patrick her first, now deceased husband. He had to pause every so often to comfort his mother further until she was again ready to hear more. Of course Evan told them much more about John since he was the only one of their newly extended family he knew well, and yet he was very well aware of that fact that he only knew bits and pieces of the complex man that was his older brother. He wondered if David was anything like John. Until now, John hadn't shared much about David. Evan knew the brothers hadn't talked for years until their father's funeral but had than made an effort to get to know each other again.

When he finished, his parents, especially his mother, sat very still, moved and shaken. His mother's face now showed red and puffed eyes but he could tell she was over the worst. His mother smiled at them shakily when suddenly Evan could hear the front door opening.

"Hello there? Anybody home?" his sister called.

The door to the living room opened and Evan was sprung upon by a very excited five-year old and an equally as animated seven-year old.

"Uncle Evan!" His nephews flung their arms around his neck.

"Uncle Evan, your arm is in a cast."

"Are you hurt, Uncle Evan?"

"Why's your arm in a cast?"

"How come your arm's in a cast?"

"Can I paint a picture on it?"

"I want to paint a picture on it too, Uncle Evan."

"I will also sign it for you, Uncle Evan."

"If Andy can sign it can you help me sign it, too? Please? I always get the "N" wrong. But I know the others! Hear! Nick, it spells N but I already said that, I, C, K!" Nick looked proudly at his uncle.

Evan was about to praise his youngest nephew when his sister walked in after putting away their coats and stuff.

Julie entered the room with Tom following her both with a big smile on their face but Julie came to an abrupt stop her husband crashing into her and her smile faltering.

"Why is everybody looking so shaken up?" His sister asked cautiously while she and Tom tried to get hold of the boys.

"Welcome home, Evan." His sister then also pulled him into a hug while his brother-in-law followed suit both then hugging the others but the concerned expression never leaving their faces.

All of sudden Evan had to think of John. His brother would have a hard time coping with all that hugging. Suddenly the image of John awkwardly enduring all these hugging made him laughing out loud.

"What are you laughing about?" Tom asked, were as the rest of the family were looking at him questionably.

"Well, um, you see," he glanced at his parents, "I tried to picture John's reaction to this hugging-habit of this family – I'm pretty sure he is more comfortable with combat than hugging." Evan grinned "I remember…"

"Now wait a minute," Julie cut in, somewhat relieved, apparently nobody had died after all. "Who is this John guy and why would we hug him? Is there something you want to share, brother dearest?" She gave him a stern look.

What?! Oh, no… Evan looked at her wide-eyed resembling more a deer in the head lights than a trained air force officer stationed in another galaxy in a combat zone.

Luckily, Evan was rescued by his mother.

"Take a seat you both. And why don't you boys go into the garden? Why don't you try and see if you can find Tiger."

"But we want to play with Uncle Evan!" the boys exclaimed in protest.

"Well I'm sure your Uncle Evan will play with your boys later. Right now he needs some rest."

At that Andy and Nick along with their parents looked at Evan quizzically, who reassured his nephews that he would be glad to play with them later on but didn't comment the 'rest'.

Still a little upset and sulking, the boys went outside.

"So what's up?"

"Your brother has a head trauma due to an accident, which is why he's on sick leave. If it was only for his broken arm they would have put him on desk duty."

Julie and Tom gave him a once over. "You okay?"

"Yeah, thanks. But no stress or exertion allowed – doctors orders."

"I'm glad to hear that," Tom commented. "Um, well not the doctor's order…"

"I hope you'll get well soon!" Julie said. She then spotted the picture on the table. "Is that him? John?"

"Yeah that's John," her mother confirmed while she looked lovingly at her boy's picture. "So… let me tell you about John. Evan, I think it would be only right if I'd tell them."

Julie and Tom were clearly startled. Both had assumed that the man on the picture, who was clearly military, was someone Evan would have an explanation for.

"Oh, um, okay. You sure you're ready?" Evan had told this story once. He was ready to do it again. But then maybe he mother needed to do this now.

"I don't know. I think I a little of a mess," his mother replied with a shaking laugh which sounded closer to a sob. Sarah put her complex whirled up emotion into a short world. Despite her still feeling shaken up she knew, that she had to tell her daughter and her son-in-law herself. Perhaps telling this story would help her also. She drew in a deep breath readying herself.

"So let me tell you about John…"

* * *

**AN** I don't know if someone with amnesia can remember feeling of sort without any proper memory (actually I'm pretty sure it's impossible) but I think Sheppard deserves a loving mother. I know at this point in the series Sheppard's father is still alive but I didn't want to go there since things would be getting too complicated then.


	9. Midway

**AN** Thanks to everyone who reviewied :-) I'm always wondering wheather you like the new chapter or not.

Hopefully you will enjoy this one ;-)

Thanks to June odyssee this chapter was betaed :-)

The new cover picture was made by rogue187 who contacted me a while ago. I wanted you to be able to see it too so asked permission to use it for a while. Thank you so much!

* * *

John sat at his office gazing out of the window. He _tried _to do his paperwork, he really did, honestly. But, for the first time since coming to Atlantis, he _desperately_ wanted to leave this place he called home now.

His mom was alive and he has a little brother who happens to be his XO, dammit. Along with Evan he now also has a little sister along with a brother in law and two nephews…

'and hey, did I mention Mom being _alive_? No wonder your mind simply won't shut down, John, when you try to focus on duty rosters, replenishment, or only to get some sleep. Humph, the Daedalus _should_ have arrived at earth by now. Did Evan already tell Mom? Would she remember?' Restless, John got up and walked over to his brother's table, gripping for the family picture Evan had put there. When he looked at the happy smiling family and his mother giving her special smile he had thought he'd never see again, all he wanted was to be there, on earth, with them.

"Colonel Sheppard, this is Weir, please come in."

John was startled by a voice in his ear. He touched his ear pierce "This is Sheppard."

"Colonel we got a message from the SGC. Please come to my office."

"I'll be there right away."

Looking once more at his mother's smile, he hurried to Weir's room.

"Elisabeth, what is it?"

"Please take a seat John."

Rodney was rushing through the door. "Did they give their okay? I know the intergalactic bridge is a new and a genius idea but I don't know why it took them so long. I did all the calculations myself and it really wasn't _that_ difficult, at last not to me…"

"McKay!" John cut in. "Take a seat." But the man had a point, even if he would never tell his friend so. See, being the good friend he was, he tried to keep Rodney's ego in check. Only for his own good, of course.

Equally unperturbed by McKay's behavior, Weir simply said, "Welcome Rodney. Please sit down. And yes, they did give their okay."

"They did?"

"The SGC wants us to run a test today if possible. Colonel Sheppard, if you're up to it?" Weir asked with a smile.

If he was up to it? He would be able to gate back to earth, EARTH! If he played his cards right he would be able to convince Elisabeth to give him a few days off. A huge grin came to his face "I'm happy to do so."

"Well, I'm glad you are so eager…" Weir raised an eyebrow at him. "But since this is, in a way, flight related I shouldn't be that much surprised. Though I didn't know you had that much trust in McKay's programming skills…"

"Hey," McKay cut in, annoyed.

"Well, McKay…" John commented dryly. "All I'm saying is 'a whole solar system'!"

At that McKay looked at him downcast and somewhat guilty.

Now feeling a little guilty himself, John added, "But, um I trust you on this one, McKay." And he did.

"You do?" Immediately McKay was cheering up. "Okay, I'll prepare everything, when do we start?" McKay wanted to know, already rushing to the door, all hyper energy.

"The test will be at 1100." Weir was barely able to get out before McKay hurried away. Then noticing John's hesitation she asked, "Colonel? Anything amiss?"

'Just ask her John. If the bridge will work properly chances are high she'll agree to it.'

"Um, I wanted to ask if you'd be able to go without me, just, um, for a little while?" John would have put on his best puppy look, only he knew that Elizabeth never fell for it.

"Get along without you? John what's up?" Flabbergasted, Weir narrowed her eyes at him.

"Um, well, of cause I know that Major Lorne is already on sick leave but with the bridge working, I will be able to return in a heartbeat. It's been quite lately and I really have some urgent family matters…" Fading out, John shuffled his feet. 'Yeah, well done, that was _so_ eloquent, John. What happened to playing your cards right?'

Weir looked at him stunned. The Colonel wasn't one to bring up his family and he clearly wasn't one to turn his back on his command especially with his XO on sick leave. It was this that helped her to make up her mind. "I assume this is something _very_ important to you. So I agree but I fear you will need to be on call." It _had_ been rather quite these days.

"Thank you! Um, you are right, um, this is important to me and oh, it's perfectly fine if I stay on call." John beamed at Elisabeth. Noticing the worried look on her face, he was relieved that she knew him well enough not to expect any further explanations. When he was walking to his quarters to pack, his mood had improved to the point that he was grinning like Cheshire cat and bursting with happy energy John was humming his favorite Johnny-cash song while packing his duffel before he returned to his office where he called for Major Duncan to give him his instructions.

"Sir!" Duncan reported his CO's office.

"Ah there you are Major, at ease."

"I'll be gone for a few days…" John informed him cheerfully without paying attention to the bewildered expression of his subordinate who only then noticed the duffel bag.

"…it's been quite these days and so I took a few days off. I'll give you my instructions and I'm certain you will be fine."

"Oh. Of course, sir!" 'Perhaps the Colonel will go surfing on New Athos for a few days? It had been quite after all. Yea, that'll be it!' Duncan mused and added, "And if I may say so, I hope the waves will be exact as you need them to go surfing on New Athos."

"New Athos?" John looked at him, startled. "No, I'm going to Earth."

"Earth?!" Duncan nearly squeaked much to his embarrassment, but frankly he didn't know what to make of this any longer. Going surfing on New Athos, now that he would have understood, the Colonel had done this before, but Earth? That meant weeks of absence not days as he had assumed and Lorne was on sick leave!

'God, John! Try to focus! Next the Major will think you'll abandon your troops! Perhaps, just _perhaps_ you should have started this briefing with the info about the intergalactic-gate-bridge? Okay, _Colonel,_ sort this out!'

After he had upgraded the Major about the bridge he could clearly see his temporary second in command relax. Good!

"…so, Major, if anything comes up I'll be able to return on short notice and it will be only for a few days." John finished his speech.

"Uh, for a short while you had me worried Colonel" Duncan was back to his trustful mood. "So enjoy your stay, sir!" he smiled.

'Congrats John, so after all you were able to reinstall the trust. Be sure you'll do better with Ronon and Teyla or McKay. Now that will be some explanation to do!' Out loud he said, "Thanks Major, dismissed."

John was on his way out when Teyla and Ronon came by.

"Sheppard."

"Colonel. Rodney said that you will do the test flight for the intergalactic-gate-bridge?"

"That's right." John said while thinking to himself, 'There you go John, round two, at least you already had your warming up with Duncan.'

Seeing the bright smile on his face not even the rather unlucky conversation with Duncan had been able to wipe from his face, Teyla remarked, "I am glad to see you in high spirits again. These last two weeks you seemed… distracted."

"Um, sorry if I got you worried."

"You do not need to apologize, Colonel. Is worrying not something you do for a friend?"

"Thanks Teyla, um, I only had some things process."

'Liar! Some things to process! You make me laugh! Don't you think they deserve the truth?'

"Colonel? John?" Teyla eyed him concerned and John noticed she must have said something to him.

"Huh? Sorry Teyla. Actually it wasn't only some things to process…"

He noticed Ronon fixing his gaze on him while Teyla was looking at him quietly, waiting if he would be ready to tell more.

'Uh oh. Not good!'

John was struggling - he needed to share this, it was consuming him and he was sure they would understand him. Well, Teyla was _Teyla_! As for Ronon who had lost his entire family he had no doubt he'd be thrilled on John's behalf but would otherwise keep things to himself. Later, John decided, tell them the full truth when you're back, for now begin with half of the truth.

"Um, Evan, ah, Major Lorne came to know, um, surprising family news. So I asked Elizabeth for a few days off while I'm on earth. Major Duncan will be in charge. I'll be able to return quickly if something comes up…"

McKay had reached in time to hear this last statement of John and cut in immediately, "Of courseyou will! It's my project after all. Now let's get to the part with your family. How could Lorne discover something about your family? And how so, while he was here on Atlantis?"

"See McKay, I know that's a very good question and I promise to tell the three of you everything when I'll be back…"

"…but you won't tell us anything now! I'm telling you Sheppard, sometimes sharing is best…"

"Yeah and that's way you told us all along everything about Jeannie…"

"Now that's just…"

"Rodney," Teyla interrupted. "I am sure the Colonel will tell us everything in his own time and he already promised that will be once he has returned from Earth."

"Thank you, Teyla! I _will_ tell you everything, promise, but believe me I have sort things out first."

"If you say you tell us everything when you return, that's good enough for me." Ronon nodded at John while giving McKay a stern look.

"Oh, um, okay," McKay huffed.

"Colonel." Teyla smiled at him "As I said earlier, I am glad to see you in high spirits again and I take it whatever Major Lorne told you is something good?"

"Yeah, best news ever! That much I can tell you."

McKay looked like he wanted to broach the subject again but, noticing the glare from Ronon, he left things be.

"Well, Colonel, we are glad on your behalf even without knowing everything yet," Teyla finished, looking at McKay pointedly.

"What? Oh, yes we are! I'm sure everyone would be over the moon for his _friend_ if he got this really good news even if said _friend_ decided he couldn't share this news, well at least not until _much_ later…" McKay was still sulking. "So the reason I came was to give you final information before you will be able to return to earth via the genially planned gate-bridge…"

SGASGA

Precisely at 1100 a very hyper John was sitting in his favorite Jumper dialing up earth and then took off via the unapproved bridge, leaving a confident McKay, slightly worried Teyla and Elizabeth, along a faithful Ronon behind on Atlantis.


	10. Messages

**AN** And thanks to June Odyssee and her quick work you'll be able to read the next chapter sooner than expected :-))

The POV is changing sometimes in this chapter. You'll find -0- whenever that the case so the flow won't have too much of a break but someone pointed out that it was a little confusing without any sign. I hope it'll help.

* * *

The flight via the intergalactic bridge had been rather uneventful since, apart from some little power spikes which could be easily handled, everything went smoothly and John had happily arrived in the gate room at the SGC. Sadly his happiness had long since gone for he was stuck in a meeting with the IOA and General Landry. He tried to concentrate but was interrupted on this truly challenging task by the more urgent need to stifle a yawn before focusing on the discussion again.

"... so with the intergalactic-gate-bridge we took a big step forward to the Pegasus galaxy. I'd like to thank you all for your effort." Mr. Woolsey finished his speech.

'Finally!' John pushed back his chair, stood up and hurried out before anybody took it upon himself to entangle him in any kind of further conversation. Reaching the surface after a much too long elevator-ride, John eventually all but ran from the mountain and took a rental from the car pool.

Beforehand he didn't even have a spare minute to call his brothers - brothers, as in plural! That's why he stopped in the next town, pulling his rental along to buy a prepaid cell, a task that was easily finished once the shop assistant actually believed him when he said he had no use for a contractual-cell.

Back on Atlantis John had pondered what do but in the end it hadn't been a tough decision. First of all he would visit Dave to tell him everything and hopefully they would then visit their mom and everyone else together. Of course he wanted to see his mother now and would happily call in a favor from Col. Ellis asking him to beam him over but Dave deserved better. Sadly when dialing Dave's number it went straight to voicemail. 'Okay, that was… unfortunate.' Unwilling to let anything dampen his recovered good mood, he left a message telling Dave he was on leave and on his way, knowing his brother would check regularly for messages but frowning a little at his cell none the less. Staring at it, he then had to fight himself from calling Evan. What if his mother answered the call? Better not to go there before he betrayed Dave because John didn't trust what he'd do if his mom really answered his call. Determined, John hit the road again, fast – if only he could drive more than 200miles/h.

SGASGASGASGA

It was 1800 AST or 2200 local time and John was nearly home when he noticed some flickering lights slightly away from the road. What was that? Getting nearer, it became clear that the farm was on fire. Without hesitation he was driving at full speed across the land to the farm where he came to a skidding stop. Gripping for his cell he was already punching in the number of the fire department and quickly informed them of the address and situation; The barn was on fire and it had already reached the main house.

He then ran over to the house and reaching the door which was easy enough to open, he yelled, "Fire! Is anybody there?" again and again while making his way through the house. Smoke was creeping trough the floors. He headed to the stairs where he presumed to find the bedrooms and arriving on the first floor he heard the voice of a small kid whining, "Mommy, Mommy, Mommy!"

'No, no, no. A toddler. Certainly terribly frightened.' John winced, immediately rushing over to the room he had heard the voice coming from. When he opened the door he saw a small girl crying, looking at him frightfully with wide eyes, standing up in her child's bed in her pajamas, the bars making it difficult for her to get out on her own although she had already begun to climb out.

"He," John said in his best soothing voice. "You don't have to be afraid. My name's John and you are?"

"Shann'n" replied the little girl sniffing.

"Okay Shannon, I'll get you out of here somewhere safe. And then I will look for your Mommy, okay?"

"'kay."

John lifted the toddler in his arms and made his way back. Gladly the smoke was still more near the floor so little Shannon should be as safe as possible. Once he got out he ran away from the house to an area that looked secure to him. Crouching down he released her and quickly told her, "Shannon! Listen to me! I need you to stay here while I'll go back to get your Mommy! Okay, can you do that for me?"

Sobbing Shannon nodded clinging to the teddy bear in her arms that John failed to notice before.

"Good girl! I knew I could count on you!" John praised her before turning and running into the house again.

Upon entering, he noticed that the smoke had become much worse and tried to shield himself as best he could, knowing it was much more dangerous than the fire itself but he could only go so long without breathing and he had no equipment. Once more he chased upstairs bumping into a woman on the top who wearing jeans and a shirt as John noticed briefly. She looked at him spooked by his sudden appearance but more frantic for her family.

After a long and hard day Kelly had only wanted to sit down for a minute before she started on the last task of her day – ironing. But with her husband Bob gone on a short trip to his brother she had been really tired with the extra work. She must have dozed off. Then she had woken up to this nightmare. The house was on fire and she couldn't find her children. Now there was this stranger although he seemed trustworthy. Hopefully she was right. "Shannon?! Tommy?!" she choked out.

"Ma'am! Ma'am, Shannon's already out of the house," John assured her, glad he wasn't freaking her out. Since he didn't bother to change earlier John was still in his black BDU and combat boots which could easily have frightened her.

"Oh thank you! Thank you! We have to get Tommy!"

"No! _I_ look for Tommy. Tell me where his room is. Shannon _needs_ you!"

The woman looked at him desperately. It was clearly not easy to accept that she had to leave the fate of her other child to a total stranger. But only seconds later she nodded, "His room is on the left side at the end of the next floor!"

"Okay! _I_ get him! _You_ take care of Shannon!" John said in his best command voice, putting all his confidence in it, too, before setting off. The smoke was beginning to take its toll on him, he was feeling dizzy and it had become more and more difficult to breathe. The second floor was directly under the roof with only three rooms. Up here the heat was unbearable and sweat was dripping from his forehead. Getting into Tom's room he couldn't see anybody so he looked around. Flames were already licking at the furniture and taking a closer look at the bed covers he knew Tom hadn't been in his bed as he should. Drat! Not good! Now he had to check out every remaining room in this house! "Tommy!" 'Crap! Shouting hasn't been your best idea!' John scolded himself when he had to cough convulsively. 'Tommy isn't here so up to the next, John! You faced worse! You can do this!' Gathering his strength he turned to the next door. The heat was radiating from it and had John hesitate. That room must be consumed in flames! But what if Tom was stuck inside? Bracing himself for the worst, John opened the door.

"Aah!" John cried out in pain when he burned his arm due to the flames striking out as soon as the door was open. His cry earned him another coughing fit. John tumbled backwards and nearly felt down the stairs but he was able to catch himself. Hopelessly looking at the flames shouting up, he knew he had no chance to search this room. If anybody had been in here he was dead by now! He shoved that horrible thought aside and, clutching his arm while suppressing the searing pain as best he could, John prepared himself to check on the last room at this floor.

'No, no, no!' The door felt as hot as that last one. But he had to this! He promised! Even if he hadn't he would never think of bolting. 'You don't leave people behind!' This time John kicked the door open and felt the flames at once sprung right into his face. The room was exactly as much on fire as the last one. "Aah," 'Shit!' Briefly he smelled burned flesh and hair but didn't want to think about it when he tumbled down the stairs to the first floor. At least the temperature down here was a little more bearable John noticed on continuing his desperate search. Feeling worse every minute, he searched the house but Tommy was nowhere to be found. Despaired, he fought his way back to the front door his coughing getting worse and worse. When he was finally tumbling out of the door he gasped for air, swaying over to the woman and the little girl, Shannon.

"I'm sorry!" John rasped out full of dread, his burning lungs and the searing pain of his now increased burns consuming him.

"Mom, Mom!" They both heard the voice of a teenage boy.

Kelly, who had begun running toward John, turned to her boy. "Tommy!" his mother shouted in relief, pulling him into a hug and sobbing.

"I'm sorry Mom. I know I wasn't allowed to go out with Sammy…" Distrought, Tom began to explain his absence without letting go of his mother.

"Oh, Tommy, I don't care. I'm glad you're alive."

"Oh Mom, I'm so glad you and Shannon are alright. Mom, what happened?"

"I dunno Tommy, looks like the barn took fire. Thanks to…"

"John, John Sheppard," John filled in the blank, limping nearer and feeling the tension leaving him. With Tom very much alive eventually things were getting right. He tried to get more air into his still burning lungs but seems to fail. Hurting and feeling dizzy, he swayed once more at his feet.

"I'm Kelly, Kelly Miller."

"Thanks to Mr. Sheppard, Shannon and I are safe," Kelly told her son, only now taking in John's appearance. He looked horrible! In the flickering light of the burning house she was able to see that his face was fuliginous which made his eyes stand out. His hair stood up at all angles and some of it was seemingly singed. Worst he had some bad burn holes in his uniform and not only his clothes had burned. She could see nasty burns all over his body, for heaves sake! She felt bad. This man had risked everything for her family. He all but ordered her to go and for Shannon's sake she has allowed him to do so but Tommy hadn't been in the house. That man could have died in there! Kelly shuddered at that thought.

In the distant they could already here the sirens of the fire brigade.

"Oh God! Let's find you somewhere to sit on! You look awful! I'm so sorry! If I had known... I feel horrible. You risked everything and I… I…" Kelly rambled.

"'s 'kay," John slurred out. Only one minute ago he had thought he had to tell Mrs. Miller that her son had presumably died in that fire. Now, with nothing left to do, the adrenaline was leaving his body and he felt himself swaying more and more, getting less and less air. Those burns were hurting! He felt only pain, pain in his lungs, pain of the burnings. Then everything went black as John hit the floor.

He never noticed the horrified cries of the Miller family nor the arriving fire brigade springing into action and taking control of the situation.

SGASGASGASGA

It had been a long day, everyone had so much to process and they had talked for hours deep into the night until Evan's family had finally decided to _call _it a night. Evan himself was so tired that he fell asleep as soon as his head made contact with his cushion.

He was startled awake by the striding ringing of the telephone cutting through the night-time peacefulness, which rudely awakened him to full alarm. Due to his military training, he was wide awake at once and on his way to the phone while everyone else was still fighting for consciousness.

'Something must have happened, something bad.' That much was obvious. Thank God everyone was here, so it couldn't be someone from his immediate family. Taking up the phone he said, "Lorne."

"Am I speaking with a Major Evan Lorne?"

"Yes that's me. I'm Evan Lorne," Evan confirmed alarmed.

"…You are the emergency contact of Colonel John Sheppard?"

'Emergency? John? Oh no, no, no, no!' Evan felt his head beginning to spin. He then registered of what had been said. 'Huh? John had listed him as emergency contact, when did that happen?'

"I'm calling on behalf of the Mercy hospital…"

* * *

**AN** Please let me know what you think... :-)

If you reading this chapter for the second time and wondering why 'Sarah Miller' suddenly became 'Kelly' – I changed it so you wouldn't get confused with Sarah Lorne


	11. Crash and burn

**AN** Thanks to all of you who reviewed and encourged me :-)).

The new cover picture was also made by rogue187. I wanted you to be able to see them both. Thank you so again rogue187.

Again thanks to June Odyssee you can focus on the story without beeing disturbed by grammer and spelling errors. Thanks June!

Enjoy...

* * *

Mercy Hospital

Doctor Harrison, who was on night shift, had had a quiet shift but that changed when the doors to the hospital emergency entrance burst open and paramedics came hurrying in announcing, "One patient, male, mid thirties, condition after a house fire, unresponsive, arrhythmic, flue gas intoxication and burns up to third-degree."

Then, seeing who was rushing towards them, one of them added, "Hey, Doc Harrison, will you take care of him? I'm telling you, we have a hero on your hands here. This guy rescued a family out of a burning house before the fire brigade arrived. His name is John Sheppard."

"Hi Charlie! A hero, hmm? I'll do my best for everyone but I'll try to do even better." Harrison took in the appearance of his patient while hurrying him over to the next exam room. Sheppard's face was blackened with soot; his clothes – some kind of BDU – battered. There was no base close by hence he had rarely to do with any soldiers and therefore he briefly wondered if his patient really was a soldier or someone who liked to dress as one but he then noticed the chain with the identity tags. He immediately focused on the medical condition again. By the look of it, Sheppard had not only been poisoned with carbon dioxide but also with carbon monoxide and cyan. 'Crap! Hopefully the paramedics had arrived in time!' Flue gas poisoning was dangerous and had to be treated immediately. For now the burns had to wait.

"We have to raise his oxygen-level!" he stated on the arrival at the exam room while taking away the oxygen cylinder the paramedics had used. The arrhythmic beeping of the heart monitor did nothing to reassure him.

"Sally! Intubation set!" But there was no need as Sally had it already prepared. It was high time. The moment Harrison was ready for intubation Sheppard's breathing stopped.

"Oh no you don't, we've got that covered," muttered Harrison, half to his patient and half to himself while intubating carefully. Then he checked with his stethoscope whether he hadn't placed the tube in the esophagus before blocking it and quickly attaching the life-support machine to take over the breathing. The machine was rhythmically pressing the oxygen into the lungs and the system of their hero.

"We have to get him a place in HBOT ASAP." Dr. Harrison worried for Sheppard. The team knew flooding Sheppard's system with hundred percent oxygen wasn't enough to safe him thus Nurse Natalie was already picking up the phone. The beeping of the heart monitor became frantic, alarming everyone and then Sheppard began to cramp and trash.

"No, no, no. You were fighting so well!" Harrison cried out alarmed.

At this moment the line went flat and the beeping of the heart monitor became one constant alarming pesky noise while Harrison began to perform with CPR. "Not on my watch! You don't! Paddles!"

He had to pause shortly so Nurse Sally was able to cut Sheppard's shirt open and got the dog tags out of the way. The paddles were fully charged and the announcing peeping of the machine mixed with the beeping of the flat line from the heart monitor.

"Charging to 200! Clear!"

The paddles released their electric power. Everyone looked anxiously at the monitor. Still nothing but the increasing beep of the defibrillator signaling that the paddles were recharged.

"Clear!"

Again the team was desperately looking at the monitor. 'There! A peak, another!' Relieved they noticed that the heart was beating steadily again. Harrison relaxed some and so was his team. As it seemed Sheppard really needed to give them the full show. They still had to treat the burns…

"Okay, now that you're back with us let's having a look at your burns." Doctor Harrison addressed his unconscious patient and cut away rest of the burned clothes. This time he took the dog tags off passing them over to Nurse Natalie who put them to the rest of their patient's belongings. 'Okay these burns are nasty and some were severe but most of the skin was unharmed so extensive burns there wouldn't be a risk for the patient.' Feeling relieved he began to treat the burns speedily. "There that was the last one! Natalie, what's with the HBOT?"

"We're all set and ready to go, Doctor Harrison!"

"Well. That's good. Let's get him there!" Doctor Harrison was glad they would be able to treat that man with HBOT now as this would increase his prospect. He was already rushing out with his patient on the stretcher while Nurse Natalie was assisting him, giving artificial respiration. They had to detach Sheppard of the ventilator for transport so currently it was again replaced by a bag-valve mask. The transport shouldn't take long but the sooner the patient was back on life support the better and pure oxygen the better.

0-0-0-0-0

Of course, the paperwork also had to be done while the patient was treated and tonight Nurse Hannah was on duty. The paramedics had given her the personal belongings of their latest emergency. Some of the forms had been already filled out on the ride to the hospital but most of them were still blank.

'Okay, the patient's name is John Sheppard, he's with air force, Lt. Colonel. No address, no telephone number.' She would have to call his base for further information. If only she knew which one it was! She looked through his belongings and found his briefcase. There was a folded note. A form of sorts! Jackpot! His emergency contacts! A huge grin spread across her face. Yup, she was lucky! This guy had pulled up some heroic stunt by what the paramedics told her and the sooner he had his family with him, the better.

She waited for the treatment to finish so she could give better information to his family. Not that she was allowed to tell much over the phone anyway but it was always good to be eventually able to calm the people down who received her calls.

Upon hearing the doors of the exam room open she looked up again. Sheppard was rushed to the elevator accompanied by Dr. Harrison and Natalie which was never a good sign. Then Sally came out as well.

"Sally, you finished?" she called to her colleague.

"Yes, Natalie's accompanying Doctor Harrison to HBOP. Up here we're finished. He's still in critical condition. We had a respiratory failure and he crashed on the table…" She handed the rest of the colonel's belonging to Hannah. "So who is he? What did Charlie tell you?"

Hannah filled Sally in.

"Wow. He really is a hero!" Sally exclaimed.

"You can say that. Let's hope for the best. For now I have to call his people, let them know what happened. He has two emergency contacts. I want to try first for David Sheppard. They have the same name so I guess he's family while the other one is a Major and may be more of a friend."

Hannah called David Sheppard but her call went straight to voice mail. "Crap! Okay, hopefully I'll have more luck with Major Lorne…"

The phone was ringing. She waited, then… someone was picking up the phone.

"Lorne."

"Am I speaking with a Major Evan Lorne?"

"Yes that's me. I'm Evan Lorne," the voice confirmed, sounding alarmed.

"…You are the emergency contact of Colonel John Sheppard? I'm calling on behalf of the Mercy hospital. The colonel was brought in tonight after he was caught in a burning house. I regret to inform you that his condition is critical…"

Hannah could hear the man on the other end sighing despondently. "What happened exactly?"

"Sorry, I'm not allowed to give any details over the phone but it's bad. Will you be able to come?"

"Of course." No hesitation on the matter. Hannah was glad the Colonel had appealingly good friends.

Then the Major continued, "We'll all come!"

'Wait, all? Now what's that supposed to mean?' she wondered.

"Can you give me the exact address?" the major demanded.

"Of course, sir!" Whether the Major would bring along some friends or the entire unit was not for her to comment, so Hannah remained professional and gave him the full address before she ended her call.

0-0-0-0-0

Evan stood in the living room, the phone still in his hands, staring at it in denial. This couldn't be happening. John should be on Atlantis not here on earth in a hospital, in critical condition no less. Why was he involved in a house burning anyway?

When the rest of the family came rushing down the stairs he got a grip again, snapping into a mix of older brother, loving son and Major - but mostly Major. 'You have to be strong now, for them and for John.'

His father looked at him concerned. "Evan, what happened?"

"Dad..." Evan noticed that there wouldn't be any easy way to say this. "… that call, it was on behalf of John. He's in hospital."

He could hear the sharp gasp of his mother while the others gazed at him, concerned and troubled.

"How?" his mother choked out. "Evan, what happened? Was he shot?"

"No. That's not it at all. Apparently he was back, um, state side. They told me he was injured due to a house burning…"

"A house burning?" his sister repeated, dumbfounded.

"Why was he involved in a house burning?" his mother wondered.

"I'm sorry they didn't tell me. But, um…"

"There's more?"

'With John there's always more…' Evan thought and then tried to order himself, 'Just tell them everything Evan! You are freaking them out!' "Oh Mom, with John there's always more!" Evan sighed desperately. 'Oops!' He hadn't wanted to say _that_ aloud.

"What do you mean, Evan?!" His mother's voice had become stern.

"Um, Mom I'm sorry." He didn't care to explain that he was sorry for his outburst as well as the bad news he had yet to tell them as he was sure his family would understand the general meaning behind his apology. "They told me John's in critical condition."

Everyone was shocked. His mother had sunk into an armchair with his father standing next to her, one arm around her shoulders to comfort her while Tom did the same for Julie on the sofa. It reminded Evan of the way they had supported each other only a few hours ago when he told them about John. Only then it had been the kind of commotion that was good, in a way. His family had barely known of John existence but he seemed to already be a part of their family and now the commotion was one of the bad kinds, the horrible kind to be exact. Earlier, Evan had told them some funny stuff about John but also stories of bravery and now, much to their dismay, John was proving these stories of bravery to be true.

Evan, who was still in 'Major-Mode', announced, "Mom, Dad, we need to arrange a trip. You'll all come, I suppose?"

"Of course we will. We'll all go," his mother unknowingly repeated his words from earlier.

"Yeah, I was sure of it." Evan smiled warmly at his family. He could see that everyone was still dazed by the news but they were functioning and they cared. Now their first priority was to get to John. "It's way too long to go by car, I suggest we take the first flight tomorrow."

His family nodded their okay.

"You're right Evan", his father said. "Hand me the phone I'll book the tickets."

"Wait!" Julie cut in. "What about the boys? They need to go to school."

"Don't worry about them. You'll fly, I'll be taking care of our boys." Tom told his wife, who looked at him thankfully.

Evan noticed belatedly that his nephews hadn't been awoken by the noise. 'Thank God for that. Better they face those news tomorrow morning.'

After everything was settled and everyone had packed, they tried to get some rest before they had to drive out to the airport. Evan desperately wished he could already be on his way. Laying here on his bed, nearly fully dressed and waiting for the morning to come was distressing him exceedingly.

0-0-0-0-0

Evan rushed into the hospital and straight to the information desk his family hot on his heels.

"Hi, I'm Evan Lorne, you called me on behalf of John Sheppard." Evan didn't bother with military ranking. He was here to see his brother not his CO!

The nurse at the desk looked up. "John Sheppard? Let's have a look. It says here that you're his emergency contact. Okay, Mr. Lorne I'll inform the doctor that you're here. Mr. Sheppard is in room 224 in intensive care. Follow this floor and get to the left wing. It's on the second floor to the right."

"Thank you. Did you already inform his base?"

"No, I'm sorry. We didn't know where he is stationed."

"Okay, I'll give you the number."

He gave her the number of Stargate Command, even though they would announce themselves as 'deep space telemetry'.

Still tense, Evan then led his family, who had remained silent during the conservation, to intensive care. It was a big hospital so it took them a while to get there and when they finally reached the right floor a doctor with a serious expression on his face greeted them. "Mr. Lorne?"

"That's me. I'm Evan Lorne. My parents and my sister Mrs. Julie Archer."

Evan than noticed the sheer plastic bag the doctor was carrying and his gaze transfixed itself at the pair of dog tags among other belongings it contained.

"No!" he heard himself whispering and then a louder, strangled, "NO!"

"Evan? What is it?" His mother asked worriedly while his father wanted to know, "What is it, son?" and his sister exclaimed, "Evan?!"

"Don't tell me we're too late…" Evan looked at the doctor in desperation.

"Too late? No! I'm sorry if I've giving you the wrong idea. No, Mr. Sheppard is very much alive." The doctor looked at him with regret.

"Oh, thank God!" Evan breathed in relief, noticing briefly his heart beating strangely without giving it a second thought.

"Evan! You nearly freaked me out!" His sister complained while his parents looked at him concerned.

"I'm sorry. But seeing John's dog-tags freaked _me _out." Evan had pulled himself together again and looked at his family apologetic.

"His dog tags?" The doctor wondered since he had thought it had been the way he addressed the family.

"Yeah. Doctor…"

"Cooper."

"Doctor Cooper, see, you never take the dog tags off a soldier unless he's dead!"

"I'm sorry Mr. Lorne. I wasn't aware of this. As I'm sure my colleagues weren't from night-shift."

Dr. Cooper handed the bag with John's belongings to Evan, who awkwardly tried to hold it with his injured arm while his right hand was immediately fishing for John's dog tags. He finished his task just as the others understood what he was up to and offered their help. After a moment of hesitation Evan put them in his right breast pocket. Wearing them would simply be wrong. He would try to give them back to his brother as soon as possible. Maybe there even was chance to hang them around John's neck again today.

"Can you tell us more about his condition?" Evan asked giving the bag to his father who had already reached out for it.

"I wasn't the one to treat Mr. Sheppard this last night but I've been looking after him ever since this morning. As far as we know Mr. Sheppard tried to rescue a family out of a burning house. In doing so he got some severe burns but nothing life threatening. What is really worrying us is the flue gas intoxication. He was unresponsive upon his arrival and hasn't regained consciousness yet, my colleague also informed me that he stopped breathing and his heart stopped. We were able to reanimate him but I fear his condition is still critical."

Evan saw his mother gripping for his father's arm, while Julie clung to him. He didn't felt good he noticed, his heart was still beating strangely, okay he was afraid on behalf of John but this was different. Evan shook it off. Now he had to take care of his family. This was not the time to worry about some presuming meaningless nonsense.

"So you're telling me my son could still die?" Evan's mother asked in a small voice.

"Your son?" Doctor Cooper wondered.

"John is my brother, Doctor Cooper," Evan explained, adding, "But this will be doctor-patient confidentiality."

This earned him a quizzical look from the physician but he nodded and confirmed, "I'm sorry, Mrs. Lorne but I fear you're right. Your son isn't over the worst."

"Can we see him?"

"Yes, I'll show you to his room."

Upon entering, they found John lying in his hospital bed hooked up to pain meds, attached to all kind of monitors and, much to their horror, a ventilator being one of them. The steady stomp of it pumping oxygen into John's lungs was accompanied by the beeping of the heart monitor.

Evan stared at his brother in dismay as did his parents and his sister. John's head was wrapped in a white bandage the color of his skin matching the color of the bandages where it wasn't lightly burned. His eyebrows were singed off adding to his awful look. Bandages were also covering part of his arms. Evan didn't know if John got burns on the rest of his body too but he feared as much.

"As I already told you, while his burns may look awful, there is nothing to worry about. They will heal in time," Dr. Cooper reassured them upon their horrified looks. "He only burned part of his arms, his right leg and obviously his head, but fortunately those burns are the lightest. Please call me if there is anything I can do." With that he left the room.

Evan glanced over to his mother to see how she was holding up. She held herself up straight while she walked over to John's bed, taking a seat and gathering his bandaged hand his hers. "John! It's me. It's Mom," she told him tenderly. "I'm so sorry I missed so much in your life. And look what happened to you now, John! But I'm so proud of you. They told me you rescued a family. You have to hold on John…" His mother continued talking to John whereas the rest of them were standing slightly back to give her some space, knowing that this was her moment alone.

Watching them, Evan had to think of Dave who presumably was still unaware that his mother was still alive and that he had two brothers instead of one and, also, a little sister. 'Had anyone informed Dave about John?' The thought crossed his mind. The nurse at the front desk hadn't mentioned it and he didn't know if Dave was also listed as emergency contact.

'So you better call him.' Evan slipped out of John's room after whispering to his father where he was heading. He wasn't allowed to use his cell in the hospital so he had to get out. Purposely hurrying down the corridor to the next elevator and then walking down more corridors, he was eventually outside dialing the number John had given him. 'Damn! Voice mail!' But Dave was in business so maybe he had turned it off during a meeting. But this couldn't wait. He would at least leave a message.

Evan walked back to John's room and arrived in time to see John starting to crash while his heart monitor was beeping wildly and irregular, adding to the unnerving scene. Then Dr. Cooper burst into the room and the nurses shooed everyone out. Through the window, Evan watched helplessly as the medical team was working on John, while his heart was pounding like mad. After some minutes that stretched to eternity, the team seemed to relax slightly and finally Dr. Cooper came out looking drained but happy.

"We were able to stabilize him before he flat lined. Everything went well."

Evan and his family shared a much relieved group hug when Evan noticed his heart beating arrhythmic again.

Oh, no! This really seemed bad! Hadn't Carson warned about stress?

Dr. Cooper, who had watche the family attentively, must have noticed that something was off. "Mr. Lorne? Are you feeling alright?"

Evan didn't wanted to distress his family any further and was about to crack a dry joke while asking for a seat but instead he felt the floor rushing towards him. The last thing he heard where the anguished cries of his family adding to his own misery, if only for a spit second before everything went black.

* * *

**AN** HBOT: Hyperbaric oxygen therapy


	12. Heart ache

AN

And again June odyssee betaed the chapter – thank you

Enjoy...

* * *

When Evan came to he found himself lying on the floor while Dr. Cooper was checking his vitals and his family were huddled together looking at him worriedly.

"There you are again," Dr. Cooper said taking the stethoscope of his chest.

Evan shakily closed his shirt while he tried to get on his feet.

"Easy there," the doc stopped him. "Okay, as far as I can tell your heart is palpitating. This could be the reason why you lost consciousness. Your system shut down for a mere moment. I'd like to monitor you - at least over night but in order to help you properly I'll need your medical file. As for now… tell me everything."

"Evan recently suffered a severe head trauma. Right now he's on medical leave," his mother told the doctor before Even got the chance to say anything.

"Okay, that would probably be what caused it. What happened to your brother seemed to have been too much stress and triggered a set back. Let's get you settled, first. Until we have everything ready I want you to stay right here on the floor but please lean with your upper body against the wall."

Evan's father took off his jacket and helped his son against the wall before he folded his jacked to put it behind Evan's back for comfort.

"Thanks Dad!" Evan was grateful, but he also felt embarrassed by the whole situation. Not his father helping him to sit up, but losing consciousness and adding to his family's stress.

'Well, Evan this went really well… Now they'll be worrying for you too.' He cringed at the mere thought.

"That's good, Mr. Lorne. Okay, I need to make a few arrangements," Dr. Cooper told Evan and then addressed the Nurse who had been with him, "Nurse Helene, please bring another bed into Mr. Sheppard's room." Turning to Evan he asked, "I think you'd rather stay there then at different room in the internal medicine? It's one floor above?"

Evan nodded.

"That's what I thought. We normally don't do this but this situation is kind of unique. I don't think you will be able to relax as much as needed if we'd put you in another room, let alone another ward, where your weren't able to check on your brother. So I think I'll be able to pull this off."

When the doc left them Evan was accompanied on the floor by his sister, who elbowed him lightly. "Don't you do that ever again!"

"I'm sorry." Evan looked up miserably at his family.

"It's not your fault Evan," his mother reassured him, looking more relaxed now but still concerned. "You told us, that your doctor didn't want you to be in any stress. Who could have known something would happen to John?"

Evan admired his mother for her strength. He was about to tell her so when the nurse came down the corridor with his bed.

"There you go Mr. Lorne," she said, smiling at him. "Make yourself comfortable above the blanket for now. I guess someone from your family will come back later to drop off some things for you?"

He hadn't thought about it. He wasn't used to others doing these things for him.

"Okay I'll go and get your stuff," his dad offered, but his offer made Julie get a move on.

"I'll go!" she exclaimed. "It's best. So Mom can stay, as I know she will and Dad… just remember our family vacation where you offered your packing-services…"

Despite the situation Evan had to snigger at the memory as had his mother.

"Yeah, Dad I'm sorry but that isn't your strongest gift…" Due to his father they had had to buy half their necessities anew. And so instead of enjoying their first day of the holiday, they had had to find the nearest mall and go shopping.

"Okay." His father held his hands up in surrender, smiling weakly at them.

"That's settled then," Evan said, "Dad, can you give me a hand here?" He wanted to follow the orders and move himself to the bed which was now ready for him in John's room.

"Of course!" His father pulled him gently to his feet so Evan could walk to the bed.

'Who knew John and I would be roommates so soon?' Evan mused. It would be cool if only his brother was better off. While Evan made himself comfortable the doc came back in.

"Okay, I was able to clear it. You will stay here as long as it takes. But now, please open you shirt, Mr. Lorne, I need to attach you to a heart monitor, just in case and it will help us to collect the much needed data." After finishing his task he continued, "We need the number of your base to ask for your medical records."

"Um, sure. It the same as my brother's, so you already have it."

Dr. Cooper looked at him and then asked reluctantly, "Is that the reason why you don't want anyone to know you're related?"

"Pretty much, yes."

"Okay, I leave you to the hands of your family for now. I'll come back later to see if we'll need to get you under any medical."

For a while the room went quiet so the sounds that the machine created made themselves heard so much more. Again they heard the stomping sound of the life support and the regular beating of John's heart monitor was now accompanied by the more irregular beat of his own.

"Um, well." Julie cleared her throat. "I'll drive back to the hotel, to collect the things for Evan." Evan's father fumbled for the keys of the rental and handed them to his daughter.

"I'll be back as soon as I can." With one last glance at both her brothers Julie left.

His dad took a seat at the foot while his mom chose to sit between his bed and his brother's, taking John's hand once again in hers and stroking it gently.

"Are you feeling better now Evan?" his mother asked, still concerned.

"Yeah, thanks. I think it's just a minor setback due to… well you know…" he broke off awkwardly, looking at John's still form. Even if he wasn't as breezy as John, he was still a man of action and he didn't like it when he could do nothing.

"I know you want to do _something_, Evan," his father said "I _know_ you. But right now, you'll do the most if you follow the doctor's orders." His dad looked at him sympathetically.

They then talked for a while in low voices before Julie came back. "So I've packed a few things, or more precisely, I only left a few things at the hotel as you didn't bring that much with you anyway. I'll put them into the closet near the door." After she finished Julie dug into the bag one last time. "I brought along something to read." She said handing him a few magazines and a book.

Evan looked at the cover of the bright yellow book which showed a traffic warning sign with plane in it. He read the title, "Sorry, We Missed the Runway..?" He quirked an eyebrow at her.

"Well, the assistant told me it's rather popular. It's a collection of anecdotes around public flights. They seemed quite funny," Julie defended herself.

"Thank you. I'm sure I'll enjoy them, Julie," Evan replied. His family then left him since the doctor had made it clear that John and Evan both needed to rest, John more than Evan and so visiting hours were limited.

Evan sighed. 'Once again confined to bed.' But he knew he would be alright again soon, but John was still fighting. Seeing John lying there still and seemingly unaware of his surroundings while his body was fighting to survive, Evan would give anything if only he could help his brother. His father knew him well. It was hard to accept that he wasn't able do a thing for John at this moment, not even entertain him. With the stress and the adrenaline of the last hours finally diminishing, Evan was left drained and tired. Perhaps it was best to try and sleep for a while since after all he only had a few hours sleep last night. Forcing himself to let go, Evan finally drifting into sleep.

In the afternoon John was brought to a special treatment they called HBOT. They told Evan that they tried to raise his oxygen level with the help of this hyperbaric oxygen therapy. Living on a base full of scientists, Evan had no problem picking up the concept behind it, much to Dr. Cooper astonishment. While he waited Evan tried to distract himself by browsing through the magazines but wasn't able to focus on the articles. Eventually John was brought back by a pleased doc.

"Here we are again Mr. Lorne! We were able to make some progress. We're hopeful the coma will be over in a few days. I was also able to contact your base and they send me your files already and told me they would make sure I was getting your brother's ASAP."

"I feared as much, Dr. Cooper. You see, we both aren't stationed state side. I'm on sick leave so naturally our doc sent my file along, but for my brother's they must contact our base first."

While Evan was sure the SGC would do all they could and make an extra gate-schedule to Pegasus he wished Carson would be here. He liked Dr. Cooper and he seemed competent but it wasn't the same. Besides, Carson knew them both best. Evan still wondered how John had come to Earth and all he came up with was the intergalactic bridge they had been talking about for month. If only he knew if that bridge was established and working properly. If that was the case then maybe Dr. Weir would send Carson to Earth.

"Can you tell me how fast they'll be able to send them? I thought in the days of satellites and internet such important information where to be received much easier?" Dr. Cooper looked at him quizzically.

"Sorry, Dr. Cooper, I'm sure the send the file ASAP but unfortunately it could take some time!"

"I hope so also I got the impression I caused quite an up turmoil by my call…"

'I bet!' Evan thought but didn't pass a comment.

Before he left Dr. Cooper once again told him to rest.

While Evan laid back, trying to block out the sound of the machines, his mind was working overtime on Dave not showing up. 'What's the matter with him?' Evan asked himself. He had called Dave himself but only gotten voicemail. He would try to reach him again tomorrow early in the morning. Before he drifted into sleep he ordered himself to awake early, a skill he had developed in the military but that he hadn't used for years, so he hoped he was still capable of it. He had to deal with Dave himself; he was the only one who should do it. If Dave again didn't answer his phone he would leave a much, much blunter message!

It was still dark outside when Evan awoke the next day. 'Okay that's good - you still have it in you,' he thought pleased with himself. Straining his ears he could hear nothing outside on the corridors. He slowly slipped out of bed and put on some sweats and a shirt awkwardly fumbling in the dark his casted arm as usual adding to the task but he didn't want to switch on the lights. First he would avoid everything that could disturb John's silent battle and second he didn't want to alarm the nurses. Yesterday evening he had planned this through like a military operation. Gathering the facts, meaning the building plan of the hospital, trying to remember were the public phones were since his parents had taken his cell with them. Then he tried to remember everything about shifts in a hospital and what the nurses had to prepare at which time. Only people who didn't know a thing about the work load of the medical stuff would assume they were able to hang around the staffroom drinking coffee…

Before he sneaked out Evan checked on his brother. Now that his eyes had adjusted to the pale light coming through the windows he was able to see his face. John looked peaceful, the pain meds apparently doing their work. As far as he could tell John was still 'fine', meaning he hadn't gone worse which right now he counted as good. Evan looked at his watch and once again strained his hears. No footsteps outside. Good! Evan was able to sneak out the room as planned. It was the time the shifts change and the medical would be handing over the needed info to their colleagues. No one was in the corridor, no medical emergency disturbing their meeting. Once he was out his ward it would be easier since nobody in the wards he had to pass knew he was confined to bed. Finally he reached the next public phone he had seen on his way in yesterday. 'Okay there we are. At this time Dave couldn't be in any meeting.' Evan got out the paper where he had scribbled down the number and called Dave again. He couldn't believe it! Voicemail! This time Evan left a clear message without keeping his anger from slipping into his voice. He wished he could call Dave's office but he hadn't any number or exact company name to go from. Agitated and frustrated he walked back to their room without paying much attention to his surroundings. Reaching their floor, he bumped into another man.

"Sorry!" Evan tried to excuse himself. Looking up, he froze as he recognized the other man.

* * *

AN

book reference: Stephan Orth, Antje Blinda: Sorry, wir haben die Landebahn verfehlt. (Sorry, We Missed the Runway). As far as I know it wasn't published in English although they collected stories from all over the world with quite a few from the US.

The cover picture is now again the original one. Please send a PM at Rogue187 if you liked the ones Rogue created. I think they were great!


	13. Busted!

Evan froze when he recognized the other man. Of course he had to get caught by _him!_

"Carson!" Evan shrieked.

"Major! Now lad… What're ye doing out of bed?!" Carson asked, as agitated as he was concerned while Evan looked at him flabbergasted and embarrassed at the same time.

"How? I mean… Did they actually work everything out with the bridge? ...I'm so glad you're here," Evan rambled. 'Way to go, Evan! Stop talking like a man who took a blow to the head.'

"Yes, the bridge worked just fine Major. The Colonel was the one who did the test flight." Carson, with years of experience with disorientated patients, didn't have a problem focusing on this little rambling. Unfortunately, their short conversation had triggered the attention of the hospital's medical staff and a nurse came out of another patient's room. Nurse Isabella, as Evan noticed.

"Mr. Lorne!" she addressed him, upset. "You should rest in bed!"

'Crap!' Evan thought, 'Busted!' while rambling once again, "I… um..." 'Now Evan, didn't we just agree to stop rambling? Stop behaving like an Airman who had been caught by his Sergeant slipping out of the barracks after taps!' Before his reputation could suffer some more, her attention shifted to Carson when he agreed with her.

"That's what I _told_ him!"

"And who might _you_ be?" Nurse Isabella asked sternly. "It's way past, or before, visiting hours!"

Evan felt a little bit of pity for his friend, but since Carson was someone everyone warmed up to quickly, Evan didn't felt obliged to rush to his aid out of a sense of honor. That would be an exaggerated sense of honor, now wouldn't it?

"Sorry, I'm Dr. Becket. I came as fast as I could. I'm the physician of Colonel Sheppard and Major Lorne." Carson gave her his best smile.

"Oh… I'm Nurse Isabella." She immediately relaxed. "We're glad you are here. I'm sure Dr. Anderson wants to meet you right away."

Evan had to smile to himself but his expression quickly became more guarded when Nurse Isabella turned to him again. "He's the one on duty now, took over from Dr. Cooper, who called the base."

'Whew! Seemed as she's done chewing me out. Wait, is she smiling now? Oh, manners Evan! Sure she deserves some kind of reply!' Evan managed a "Thanks for letting me know, Nurse Isabella." And returned her smile, even if it still was a little strained. 'Should I apologize for sneaking out?' Evan wondered 'No, better let the sleeping dogs lie, now that her attention is elsewhere.'

Carson, unaware of Evan's whirling mind, turned to the nurse saying, "Well I sure would like to meet him. Major, please lay down again, but before you go… How're ye lad?"

Evan had pulled himself together by then and he was glad that he got off the hook easily. He replied, "I'm fine thanks Carson. Apparently the stress caused a minor regression, but Doc Cooper wasn't too concerned." Evan could tell that this put his friend at ease.

"Well, that surely is good news Major. I'm coming to check on ye later. For now I want to get in contact with Doctor Anderson as soon as possible and then I liked to check on John myself."

"John and I share a room, Carson. Doc Cooper made it happen," Evan told him.

"That sure was a good thing to do. Otherwise you would have sneaked out to him, now wouldn't ya?" Carson gave him a knowing look.

"Um..." – 'Back to stammering again, Evan? Really?'

"That's what I thought… seems my colleague had the same impression," Carson commented dryly.

Evan then went back to bed, his pride slightly wounded whereas Carson went to meet Dr. Anderson, chatting happily with Nurse Isabella. Coming back, Evan first checked on John again but he couldn't notice any changes. He sighed, not that he was trained in reading those vital signs anyway, but he had been to the sick bay often enough to know the basics. John's heart was beating steady and regularly, which was good but he didn't know about the toxic gases he had inhaled while in the burning house. Hopefully now that Carson was here they would be able to reverse the effects soon. Seeing his brother who normally was a bundle of energy lying motionless in that bed was pretty disturbing and therefore Evan was sure his own arrhythmias would continue until his brother was awake again which meant he would stay in this room until John woke up which was in way good.

Carson came by a while later. "So Major, like you already know, you had a little recrudescence due to the stress. Don't worry; it'll fade on its own as long as you get enough rest." Carson walked over to John's bed. "Well, lad you dug a hole yourself again, didn't you?" Reading the vital signs he added "But everything looks as fine as it could. You'll pull through, just keep fighting." Turning to Evan once more, he said reassuringly, "He'll be fine. I'm sure."

Evan gave him weak smile. "This is not how I pictured our family reunion at all, doc."

"I bet, but then… it's natural for the Colonel." Carson looked at him sympathetically.

"Tell me about it." Evan gave a bleak smile. 'Oh, yeah! Your future will be holing many more times sitting at John's bed side worried for him or waiting after a missed check in from off-world. But… you wouldn't change him for the world, Evan and you know it!' That thought made him smile again - proudly.

"When the SGC called on your behalf it caused a wee bit of uproar," Carson told him. "On top, General Landry asked for Caldwell to take over as long as you're not fit for duty but Elisabeth said she would be fine with Major Duncan. So they settled for the Daedalus getting back to Atlantis and staying in orbit, just in case."

Evan could envision Weir's reaction pretty well knowing the both off them respected one another but had a much too different approach to things. Duncan would have his hands full. But even if Duncan didn't have much experience, this was his chance to get some, and as long as no big crises came up, Atlantis would be fine. Evan was sure Weir would and could rely on Caldwell if things went south. No need to worry.

"Stackhouse and Cain send their regards, they hope you'll recover quickly. Your men are quite concerned for you Major."

"Thanks for letting me know, Carson." Evan was touched by his teams worry for him, even if he had experienced it many times before and cared for his men himself too, their loyalty always reassured him.

"Ah, and so you know, for now… I kept Teyla, Ronon and McKay away. When I heard you two were in the same hospital I guessed you originally planned a family reunion." Carson looked at Evan quizzically.

"Oh, um, that's right. Thank you. I'm sure John would like for his friends to be here but he deserves to meet with our mom and the rest of our family in private first." He sighed. "He will need a lot of private time with mom…" 'Telling the team? Now is clearly not the time,' Evan thought to himself and knowing McKay would have put on a fight, he asked, "How did you manage?"

"I told them they wouldn't help John at this moment, that his family was already with him – which wasn't a lie – and that I would update them on the Colonel condition as often as possible. They were a wee bit upset, of cause."

As far as Evan could picture this scene 'upset' was putting it lightly. Teyla and Weir must have had their hands full with an agitated Rodney McKay worrying for his best friend. As egocentric as McKay could be, Evan knew he cared for his brother as much as any other of his friends.

Carson then explained to him John's further treatment and, finishing, he said, "They do all they can, now it needs time, and the Colonel's helping by putting on a fight as he usually does but I'm staying just in case." Carson assured him. "I came right here from the SGC, left my luggage with a nice nurse at the entrance. I will have to find a hotel to stay," Carson told Evan.

"Why don't you stay at the same one as my family, doc?" Evan suggested. "Actually, I would worry less for them if you agree."

"You're sure they won't mind?"

"Oh, yeah pretty sure. In fact, they would love to have you around. Good thing is, with you they can be open, 'cause you know…"

After Carson agreed Evan gave him the address and sent him on the road, relieved someone he trusted would look after them now.

Evan had asked Carson what he could _do_ for his brother and Carson had encouraged him to talk to John. Of course, Evan knew that some people who had been in a coma reported that they had been able to hear people talking to them but he had feared he would stress John out too much. Now he found himself talking to John for hours, hopping from one subject to another; or reading to him stories from the book Julie brought him and that he had indeed found funny. A thought occurred him. 'Perhaps I should ask Julie to get me a copy of '_War and Peace_''? If only he knew how far along the story John actually was…

At visiting hours they had all shown up and he could tell that they were getting along well. As predicted the Lornes welcomed Carson with open arms. Evan also noticed that his family seemed moved the military valued their sons high enough to send Carson here. The Scot was able to reassure his family and answered all their many questions patiently for which Evan was grateful, since he couldn't watch out for them as much as he liked.

Once again his Mom would take John's hand in hers sitting by his bedside, speaking with him and once in a while looking up checking on Evan, giving him a smile that held too many tears for his liking. The rest of them would talk with him in hushed voices until the very limited visiting hours were over again.

In the afternoon John was again taken to his treatment and Evan once again found himself wondering why Dave hadn't come by or at least called. When Julie was with him in the morning Evan had asked her to investigate and find out the company's name and a telephone number. He could take it from there but without access to the internet he couldn't do a thing. Understanding him in his need to finally reach their oldest brother Julie had promised to do her best. She also told him that Andy and Nick had been pretty upset when Tom told them. They were concerned even if they only had been told part of the truth and exclaimed that they would send a 'get well soon' care-package. Evan smiled at the memory. Since his nephews had their whole heart set on this task he was sure to receive this package indeed soon.

When the door opened Evan expected to see his brother brought back in but only Nurse Isabella walked in, smiling at him. "I've got a little present for your brother Mr. Lorne. The family he rescued was here to see him. Of course, we had to send them away but the little girl he saved drew him a picture." She then got out some scotch tape and fixed the picture near John's bedside at the wall. Evan had learned throughout the day that Nurse Isabella was very kind as long as you didn't get on her bad side.

"That's really nice," Evan said and asked, "Will you please say thanks for me?"

"That I will." Her smile brightened. "But don't sneak out again!"

"Promise!" Evan answered, crossing his fingers. There was still the matter of Dave after all.

"Did you just cross your fingers?!"

"Um, no?" Evan put on his most expressionless face, feigning innocence.

"Mr. Lorne!"

"Call me Evan please. You see it's complicated…" He then found himself telling Nurse Isabella the main details of their complicated family affair.

"That's…" She began after he finished but then stopped searching for the right words. "That's quite an entanglement you have on your hands Mr. Lorne – sorry, Evan." After a moment she looked at him determinately. "I'll do my best to help you. Promise!" Then she added more light-heartedly: "See, _I_ didn't cross my fingers."

"That you didn't." Evan replied smiling, glad that he had been right in his judgment of her and relieved that he now had an ally among the medical stuff. Before they could talk about it any further an alarm in one of the other rooms went off and she run out immediately.

It wasn't much later that John was wheeled back in. After finishing with John who had to be reattached to the machine in their room Dr. Anderson went over to him. They talked for little while and Dr. Anderson told Evan that John was again making further progress even if it wasn't that obvious. The worst was over. John's life wasn't any longer in danger, but they still couldn't tell when John would wake up. For now Evan was content that John had pulled through this far once again. And after Dr. Anderson left he returned to his task to entertain John again for a while, reading him an article about a new chopper.

Another day ended and Evan found himself again on what seemed to become his evening occupation; finding a way to actually tell his oldest brother that John needed him.

* * *

**AN **

I think Evan deserved a 'get-well-soon' from his team, since they can't stick around.

For everyone who was hoping that Evan had run into Dave - sorry. But... next chapter will be all about him!

Whenever ther wasn't a grammer or spelling mistake it was thanks to June again, if there are still some left they are all mine.


	14. Missed calls

Thanks to to everyone who is reviewing. Your encouragements make my day and are speeding up my writing. I will be very bussy in the next weeks but chapter 15 is almost finished... (remember 'almost' ;))

Thanks to June who betaed :))

* * *

Dave's POV

After his four days business trip Dave came home tired. During his flight back home he had been thinking about John. When his brother had shown up at their father's funeral after all those years, he had assumed it was for the money and had thrown it right into John's face as he left due to his work. Dave had been furious that his brother was leaving during the wake but so had John been when Dave had accused him of wanting to appeal against their father's will. In Dave's opinion it wasn't his fault if he had to assume the worst of his little brother after all those years. John had come back later and Dave had been glad when John had reappeared at his doorstep that day. They talked and had been able to mend some fences. As a result John had promised to stay in contact and had been sending mails since then. But Dave wondered what John was doing. He couldn't believe his brother wasn't able to tell him anything except that he really was this irreplaceable at his base, wherever this base was anyway. Where on earth could John be stationed that even emails would take days or weeks? Why couldn't he phone him? It had been a month since he received his last mail from John telling him everything was fine. Dave realized that he truly wished he knew more about John's work or his daily life. The mail had been a start but perhaps he should invite John to stay with him when he was on his next leave state side.

Finally the limo pulled up in his driveway. Handing the driver his money, he got out and hurried over to the entrance. Days of meetings and hard negotiations had taken their toll on him and all he wanted now was something to eat, a hot shower, and a good night's sleep. But first he had to check his cell for messages. Leaving for this trip in a hurry, he had forgotten to get it while the taxi had been waiting outside. Dave sighed. Hopefully nobody important had tried to reach him. But most of his business partners would have called his office anyway. However, he should check it now. Of course, the battery was down and he had to search for the charger, which he couldn't find at first since he had misplaced it. Even more annoyed he typed in his code and got to his voicemail, the feminine computer voice informing him, "Four missed calls. Received Monday/February/the third/at/5:00 pm:

"Hi, Dave! Um, this is John. I'm back, um, state side. Um, we need to talk, I've got news. I hope I'll be able to be there this evening, well, it might be getting late. I'll tell you everything then. Oh, um, don't worry it's something good but I didn't want to call your office. Okay, see you later."

Excited, Dave immediately turned off his cell and hurried up the stairs calling for his brother. "John! John?" But no one answered. Perhaps John had gone out? Dave looked for his brothers belongings in every room. Finding none he finally came to the conclusion that John never made it home. 'What happened? Sure John would have left another message if something had come up?' So Dave hurried down again to where his cell was still charging.

"Three/missed calls. Received Tuesday/February/the forth/at 1:00 am: This is the Mercy-Hospital. Mr. Sheppard we are calling you on behalf of a _John_ Sheppard who was brought in tonight. Please contact us under 319 408-6738."

'Damn! John! What happened to you now?' Dave was already hurrying upstairs to gather some fresh closes while dealing the hospital.

"This is the Mercy-Hospital, how may I help you?"

"My name is Sheppard. You called me on behalf of my brother, John…"

Much to Dave's irritation, they wouldn't give him any precise information over the phone. Getting more and more agitated by the minute, he gripped his car keys and set off.

Some miles down the road he remembered that there were still two messages waiting for him. Perhaps listening to some less threatening messages would give him something to distract him till he reached his destination.

"…Hello Mr. Sheppard, my name is Evan Lorne, you don't know me but please get in contact with Mercy Hospital, actually I'm calling from there. I'm sorry to spring this at you, but John has been severely injured in a fire. Please get here as soon as you can. I'll give you my cell number…"

'In a fire? John had been injured in a fire?' This didn't make any sense for Dave. But at least he knew more now. His cell beeped, announcing the next message:

"…Hello Mr. Sheppard, um Dave, this is again Evan Lorne. I don't know if something happened between you and John but John needs you. So whatever it is that's holding you back, try to find a way to put it aside and come as soon as you can… Please."

'Who was this guy?' Dave wondered, a little irritated by the way he was addressed. He seemed to care for his brother but what gave him the right to make these assumptions and further more acting on them and speak to him in that way. For John's sake Dave swallowed his irritation. That guy had at least tried to be polite. Before he could give it any further thought the next message was played.

"Hello Dave, this is Evan Lorne. Frankly I can't understand why you seem to care so little for your brother. Whatever you think he's done he is still your brother and I know John cares for you and since I care for John I beg you to come. Don't let him down." This time Lorne voice seemed to hold a barely hidden anger.

"You do not have any further messages." The feminine computer voice then informed him mechanically and emotionless.

Dave himself was far from being emotionless. In fact his emotions were nearly swallowing him and pulling over he tried to reach this Evan Lorne over the number he left, but it went straight to voicemail leaving Dave again desperate.

Driving through the night, Dave now also wondered who this Lorne guy was. He seemed to know John well, well enough to know about Dave, to wait at the hospital and to call David on his given name. When he called the second and third time his voice had been weary and agitated but he was clearly trying to be polite. A part of Dave bristled at the implied reproaches especially in the last message. Who did that guy think he was to speak to him in that way? He hadn't been lectured that way for a long time but then again as Lorne couldn't know that his messages hadn't reached him. He must have assumed that he simply ignored them. A while ago Dave would have flipped but since he had learned that he still cared for his little brother he was more understanding. If the rules were reserved and he had to try to reach one of John's friend he would have been short tempered. His mind wandered back to John's phone call. John had wanted to talk to him about something and said it would be good news, but he wanted to tell him in person. Dave didn't know what to make of it. Hopefully John would be able to give him all the answers he needed himself as soon as he arrived at that hospital.

When Dave finally arrived it was way past midnight and he had no chance to actually walk into that hospital and demand some answers. Worn out he checked in a first class hotel, startling the night concierge, booked a small suite, and collapsed on the bed. If only he could walk right in that hospital. Changing, he tried to get some sleep after all and it was only because his long day that his body finally took on his chance and Dave fell into a restless sleep.

* * *

AN

Thanks Laura for letting me know, that there were still some (grammer) errors although I double checked. I'm sorry. I'm glad you liked the story and thanks for rewieving.


	15. Hey there!

Thanks to all of you for your reviews and support :))

So this is THE chapter most of you have waited for at least I think it is.

Thanks to my beta June again, who made time, despite not having much spare time these days. Thank you :).

Any mistakes grammar are others are mine, but hopefully there will be none...

So, enjoy.

* * *

Evans POV

Yesterday had been some day! First he had sneaked out again, but this time with the help of Nurse Isabella who had also kept a watchful eye on him, clearly not happy with him walking around but understanding his need to reach Dave. If it turned out that his oldest brother had received all his calls and simply chosen to ignore them, he didn't think he would like him or even want to know him. Being kindhearted himself, Evan couldn't understand people who were unforgiving at all. But despite the matter 'Dave' yesterday had been wonderful! Looking over to John everything came rushing back:

_After returning to his room, Evan did his usual check on John when he noticed small movements. 'Could it be? Could John really be waking up?' John's movements became more agitated every moment, and Evan quickly chimed twice, and only seconds later Carson and Dr. Cooper came hurrying in along with two nurses, Nurse Isabella being one of them. _

"_What's up?" the docs asked, rushing over to John. But before Evan could say anything they had already seen the movements of their own and began to give orders. Frightfully but with rising hope, Evan watched as the medic team quickly prepared everything before going to work. He couldn't see a thing with the medical stuff blocking his view and then he heard John choking, coughing and retching. Those sounds did nothing to reassure him which was easily shown on his heart monitor. Besides worrying for John, Evan was grateful that nobody paid him any attention since he wasn't used to getting his emotions thrown in his face like that. _

_Carson seemed pleased. "Easy…there you go…wonderful… you're doing great!" he praised John._

'_Has John awoken?' Evan wondered 'Is he really fine?' When the nurses left his brother's bedside Evan was finally able to get look at John. He looked worn out, but his eyes were open! Evan couldn't believe it when he brother blinked at him, clearly not fully aware of his surroundings, but in Evan's eyes he was wonderfully wide awake. "John!" Evan called out, on which his brother turned his head at his direction whispering hoarsely, "Evan?" All the while looking at him as if he wasn't sure whether he should be bothered about his brother lying in a hospital bed next to him or not._

"_Easy lad! It will take some time," Carson warned. "Your throat isn't up for much talking. I'm afraid it's a side effect of being intubated. Let's cut it to a minimum. I'm sorry but I have to ask you some questions. Do you know where you are Colonel?"_

"_Hospital," he croaked, and much to Evan dismay, he then asked "Earth?" At which Dr. Cooper looked at him oddly and then glanced at Carson who didn't as much as blinked._

"_Do you remember what happened?" Carson asked instead._

_John wrinkled his forehead. "Fire." _

"_That's right," Dr. Cooper confirmed. "And if I might add, every one of that family is safe due to your action. You were brought in Monday night. Now just to check, give me your name and the date please."_

"_John Sheppard…February?"_

"_That correct. Great! You had a flue-gas intoxication but we were able to get it all out of your system." _

_Carson added, "Try to sleep some more. And no speaking."_

_Evan was relieved on the good news. John was awake and full aware, no damage done! But John wouldn't be John if he just followed the doctor's orders and unsurprisingly Evan saw John gathering himself to ask one question at least. Still only able to speak in a hoarse whisper John asked, "Evan?"_

_Evan should have known that his brother would be worried for him lying in another bed beside him as soon as he was lucid enough. 'Always looking out for others.'_

"_No need to worry," Evan said smiling at his brother. "I only had a minor setback and they confined me to bed. Nothing serious. They just let me stay here with you."_

_John gave a weak smile himself whispering, "That's fine." Then asked, "Dave?"_

"_We weren't able to reach Mr. Sheppard," Dr. Cooper cut in "But we left a message."_

"_So did I, John. I'm sure he'll come as soon as he can or more as soon as he actually hears the message," Evan tried to cheer John up. He knew him well enough to see how crestfallen John already was that Dave hadn't shown up yet. He again vowed to do everything in his power to get their oldest brother over here. He didn't know Dave and he knew he should give him a fair chance but Dave clearly didn't seem to make it easy. He had better have a damn good excuse for that absence of his. _

"_Okay I'm leaving now. Get some more rest, Mr. Sheppard. Mr. Lorne, your brother still needs much rest and rest is what you should get as well," Dr. Cooper said looking at them both._

_Evan saw that John snapped his eyes open again, which he had been about to close when he heard the doc referring to them as brothers._

"_He knows John but it's under doctor-patient-confidentiality," Evan quickly reassured his brother._

_At that John relaxed some bit whereas Dr. Cooper looked startled but left nonetheless._

"_Now Colonel, don't overdo yourself." Carson gave John a stern look before turning to Evan. "Major, no more sneaking out! I'm counting on you to do the right think for you and your brother."_

_At the last comment John raised an eyebrow at his brother, who in return only gave a half smile. 'Like hell he'd tell John that he had to sneak out trying again and again to reach Dave!' _

_After Carson left, John closed his eyes, actually doing as told, while Evan tried to come to a decision. After a while Evan had made up his mind but still felt unsure if this was a good thing to tell John or if it would add too much to his stress but despite his worries Evan said quietly, "She's here you know... Mom. They are all here, my father and Julie. Tom had to stay home with the boys." _

_John stared at him with wide eyes while heart monitor was beginning to beat wildly._

'_Crap! You shouldn't have mentioned Mom!' Evan berated himself._

"_She's here?" John rasped out._

"_Sure she is. She loves you!" _

_John now had a look of blissful amazement on his face tearing at Evan's heart. This was by no means his closed off CO but his very vulnerable lost brother. _

"_She does? She remembers?"_

"_Not quite but she remembers her feelings. She loves you!" Evan said firmly giving his brother the much needed reassurance. Since John wasn't allowed to speak and because Even knew John would like to hear more he began to tell him about their Moms reaction to the news. But John was still much too exhausted, and therefore it was only minutes later that Evan could hear John's breath becoming more and more regular and deep indicating he fell asleep._

_While Evan lied back, listening to the wonderful sound of his brother breathing and his own his mind was working overtime on what he could do to help with Dave. _

_Throughout the morning the nurses or the doc had checked on John and Carson had called his family to update them on the good news. Evan looked forward to the visiting hours in the afternoon but he was also concerned that John perhaps wouldn't be able to cope after everything he went through. _

_John had slept nearly the whole day but had awoken shortly before visiting hours. Evan wanted to give John some privacy when their mother would come but he knew he stood no chance to get that long out of the room at that hour. He talked to John about it, and after a processing what Evan told him, John had given him a short nod along with a weak half smile. " 's okay. Trust you." His brother's hoarse whisper left Evan feeling moved and honored._

_By now John had clearly gathered more strength. He seemed to be less tired but he also became restless while waiting for their mom. Not that Evan could blame him. Trying to make his brother more comfortable and to distract him, he kept telling him family tales which John drunk in giving him little smiles once in a while. It wasn't any extraordinary stories but stories that helped John to get to know his extended family better, stories that would only interest you if you were a part of the family._

John had been so nervous! The worst thing had been when Evan realized that his brother was beating himself up on his behalf. Only John could be feeling responsible for having others worrying for him when he did the right thing in rescuing that family. That was such a John thing to do! Evan glanced once more at his brother who was beginning to awake.

John's POV

Slowly John awoke. This morning he hadn't had to fight a tube in his throat, which clearly made things easier. Being intubated had been something he didn't want to repeat in the near future. Not if he could help it. His mind flashed back to the day before.

_He came to and couldn't breathe. Something was sticking in his throat. For a while it felt as if was going to get asphyxiate by that darn thing! He felt relieved when he finally got rid of it with Carson's help. Fighting for breath, some distant part of his brain wondered about Carson being there. Wasn't he on earth? Then after some minutes he noticed that not only Carson was there but Evan was lying in a hospital bed next to him. 'What the heck? What had happened to his brother now?' At first John hadn't the strength and moreover his mind was still fuzzy but as soon as he could he tried to ask about Evan and was glad upon hearing that Evan hadn't got in some kind of accident of sorts again but he felt guilty when he heard that his brother had had a stress-caused setback. He _knew _it was because of him. Evan always worried for others! Now Dave, he was different. John had thought they had turned over a new leaf but apparently he had been wrong. John hadn't known it would hurt so much. There was no use, Dave hadn't bothered to show up although Evan had tried to reassure him and had made the wild guess Dave may have missed the call. John doubted that. His brother never left home without his cell! He could be missing a business call. For Evan's sake John tried to suck it up. The docs left and then suddenly John felt Evan looking at him apprehensive before saying quietly, "She's here you know – Mom. They are all here, my father and Julie. Tom had to stay home with the boys." _

_He stared at Evan while his heart did turn a somersault, painfully and clearly displayed on his heart monitor but he couldn't care less. "She's here?" he rasped out._

"_Sure she is. She loves you!" Evan's voice sounded warm and confident. So very Evan._

_John felt warmth and bliss flowing through him. "She does? She remembers?" _

"_Not quite but she remembers her feelings. She loves you!" Evan replied firmly._

_John felt his emotions overwhelming him. After a while Evan told him about their mom's reaction to the news, which John took all in, starving for simply everything concerning his mother. But much too soon he felt himself slipping back to sleep. When he woke again it was nearly visiting hours. Evan then told him he was sorry he wouldn't be able give him some privacy when their mom would come._

_'Oh, um,' John thought. 'So are you okay with Evan witnessing what will probably some emotional breakdown of yours?' John looked at Evan for a while and brought back home everything he had learned about his little brother and it was then he knew for sure that he trusted Evan. Not his XO – he had already known that – but he trusted his little brother without feeling the need to hide himself. " 's okay. Trust you." He smiled at Evan trying to reassure him, noticing Evan felt guilty over it despite the fact it was way beyond his options to leave. If Carson's remark was anything to go by he had already tried and got caught. Also John couldn't fathom why Evan had tried to sneak out. If they had been on Atlantis now, that would have been different, but here? While they were waiting for their mom John felt himself beginning to work himself into a nervous breakdown. He still couldn't believe it. After all these years he was going to see his mother again! Before he was in a full-blown panic, Evan mercifully began to tell him tales of the family, keeping him distracted. He was glad Evan was here with him! John then frowned remembering the reason Evan was here with him. It was entirely his fault! If he hadn't inhaled that much flue gas he wouldn't have left Evan worrying that much, causing a setback! John bit his lip glancing at his brother who smiled at him in return but then he could see Evan narrowing his eyes at him before he got scolded, "Don't! Don't you dare blame yourself. You did the right thing and you know it."_

'_Drat! Evan clearly had learned how to read you well. Now is this something good?' It sure felt good to have a knowing and understanding brother again but he wouldn't be able to hide much from Evan. _

"_Without your help that family could have died! Look, Shannon even drew you a picture!" Evan pointed at the wall beside his bed._

_John craned his neck. Sure enough he could see a children's drawing hanging there. Remembering that family he smiled. Evan was right. He did the only thing he could when he ran into that house. But he still felt bad for Evan. He couldn't simply shake it off like that. _

_Someone knocked at the door and then entered. "Hello John!"_

_Johns stared at his mother. Sure Evan had told him that she would come but seeing her was something else. His heart started to beat wildly and he felt himself flooded with emotions: Happiness, fear, shyness, hurt, regret, joy. All showed on his face in a flash and ended in a bright, tearful smile. He couldn't utter a word. His breath caught. John noticed his mother smiling at him, also with tears in her eyes. She had reached his bed and crouched down to hug him. He was by no means a hugger but he had always loved his mom hugging him, and in seconds he was back being a child forgetting the worse of the world over a hug from his mom. A part of his brain noticed that he clung to her for dear life before he let go of all rational thoughts and indulged in his mother's embrace. He lost track of time, but eventually he and his mom both were able to let go._

"_Mom!" John was finally able to whisper. "Missed you!" He added, because it was true and because he had always told her everything and these words put his emotions in a nutshell. Not wanting let go of her now that he had her back he was glad that his mom took his hand in hers when she took seat near his bed. Her other hand went through his hair sticking out through the bandages. _

"_John, I… I love you. I'm sorry I missed so much of your life but I'm so proud of you John!" His mother told him and after all those years of fighting with his father, were he couldn't do a thing right John took a deep breath upon hearing her words. Words he had longed to hear even if he had this admission bottled up firmly inside. Now all his feelings came rushing to the surface and he gripped her hand firmly when this part of him came to the light after being hold in some dark corner over decades. His mother looked at him concerned._

"_You didn't doubt that, did you John? Evan told me as much as he could about you and I'm so proud of the man you became!" John felt her warmth and love in her voice, when he drunk in her words. It was as if she had never been away. Contrary to his fear he didn't felt strange or awkward around her but safe in her love. He knew she wouldn't judge him if he had to struggle for the right words. She never had. Although she had no memory of her past Evan had assured him that she remembered her love for him and hearing her words and seeing the look in her eyes he felt secure knowing it was true._

"_Yesterday evening I had a little flashback," his mom continued. John held his breath. Had she remembered him? After all these years? Could this be?_

"_I remembered drawing some flowers in a bright room and you were there. You were sitting there smiling and talking about your day. I haven't told anyone about it. I wanted you to be the first. You were so young then Johnny, so very young. About four years old. Some older kid had bullied a little boy but you had been able to stand up to that bully."_

"_Sammy. That was Sammy they bullied." John remembered that day. Sammy had been playing happily when that other boy had come along taking his toys away and had started to razz him mercilessly. Sammy had tried to get his toys back but his leg had been broken and in a cast so he hadn't stood a chance. John had seen everything when he had came along and taking the older boy by surprises he had been able to give him quite a punch on the noose which cost the older boy enough pain to clear off. Sammy and him had been friends ever since._

_Far too soon he felt his strength leaving him. He didn't want for his mom to go and so he tried to hide it but of cause his mom caught him on it. _

"_John?" She asked eyeing him concerned. "You look exhausted. No need to hide it. You need to rest. We will have plenty of time later, now that I found you again. I'm not planning on going anywhere soon. Are you up for one last short visit?"_

"_Sure," John rasped out, looking at his mom quizzically. Was the rest of the family there too? After his mothers visit he was up to the challenge._

"_It's Julie, she wants to meet you so badly."_

'_Julie! His sister!' John felt his heart again going into override and sure enough his heart monitor was beeping with raising speed. 'Darn! How had Evan lived with that?' John looked at his brother who gave him a weak half-smile and shrugged. 'How could he possibly know?' It seems he had been right. His brother could read him like a book!_

"_Julie?" John then heard his mother calling his sister. "Come on in, but I fear I've worn out your brother. I'm sorry you can't stay for long."_

_Then Julie came walking in. She was about the high as their mother with a mess of half long brown hair. Seemed they had something in common. John had to smirk. Those hairs must drive her mad._

_Julie who had messed up her hair even further upon waiting to meet John smiled at him in return. "Hi John. I'm Julie. Guess we both got our hair from mom…"_

'_What? No way! How could Julie possibly know what you'd been thinking about?' John stared at his sister, confusion shown all over his face._

"_Oh, um. No I'm not psychic. You just looked at my hair that way, John." Julie had reached him by now. "I'd truly like to hug you John… but, um…"_

"'_kay," John told her. She was his little sister after all. _

_Like their mother before, Julie crouched down to hug him. She carefully avoided his burns and it didn't feel that awkward as he had feared. After a short while she let go and pulled away. John could see that she had tears in her eyes. 'No, no, no! Crying little sister! What am I supposed to do?' John looked at Evan for backup but all his little brother gave him was a sympathetic look and a little smile. John frowned at him before turning to Julie but before he could say anything Julie began to apologize:_

"_Sorry, John. I didn't want to put you through tears," she said with a soft smile a tear running down her face._

"_Um," John began a little awkward trying to wipe the tear away despite his bandaged hands. "Better?"_

"_You better get used to it, John!" Evan interposed now grinning fully "I fear little sisters are always delivered with this defect."_

"_Evan!" His sister exclaimed turning around to his bed to poke him._

"_Hey!" Evan said. "I'm only telling the truth. John's new to having a little sister. He needs to know the basic facts!"_

_John had to chuckle at their little banter but that led him to a coughing fit. Alarmed by the monitors Carson came running in._

"_Colonel!" Carson cried out. "Easy lad!" He helped John calming down and applied some medics to calm his irritated lungs. "There you go. Better?"_

_John nodded his thanks._

"_Okay, visiting time is over. My patient needs to rest!" He addresses the family firmly who all looked at him downcast on what had happened._

_His mother gave him a quick hug for good-bye. "Try to get some sleep, Johnny!" she said, stroking his hair._

_Then turning to Evan and hugging him also, she said while she ruffled his hair, "You as well, Evan!"_

"_Bye, you both!" Julie said. "Oh, I nearly forgot. The boys send you a package!" She rushed outside and came back with a rather giant package._

_John eyebrows met his hairline. 'What the heck?' _

"_Well I fear this will have to wait a little longer my dear!" Carson told her. "But I see to it this evening!"_

_With that he shooed them out and with last smiles and hand waving everyone left, Carson being the rearguard._

End flashback

John looked around the room in the bright morning light. There was more drawing attached to the walls. Drawing made by his new nephews Nick and Andy. Two get-well-soon cards one for him and one for Evan had been in that package as well as two balloons with a similar inscription. Along with it they had sent some home-baked cookies. Every one of them in the form of a small airplane. They were in a bowl Carson had provided sitting on the table between their beds. He really would like to meet Andy and Nick. They seemed to be great boys. Looking around he noticed that Evan was awake too. "Morning!" John rasped out.

"Morning John!" Evan replied, smiling broadly.

'Yup! This will be a great day! Even in hospital,' John decided. He was looking forward to visiting hours with his family and some delicious cakes. And maybe Dave would call. John thought. Not willing to let his oldest brother spoil his good mood.


End file.
